12/30/2003

WELL, MAYBE I HAD THE RIGHT IDEA ALL ALONG. . .

Your Dating Resolution: Work on Yourself First


That's right. It's more about you than any guy you date.

Take a year (or at least a few months) off from dating.

Read more books. Make more friends. Get a makeover.

The happier you are, the better guy you'll get.

Cliché, but true.




What's Your Dating Resolution? Take This Quiz :-)




Find the Love of Your Life
(and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

HRM. I'M NOT SURE IF I SHOULD BE OFFENDED, OR DEVISING A PLAN OF ATTACK. . .

marry for money



Your New Year's Resolution Should Be: Marry For Money!


Most your relationships end in a flash

So you might as well be in it for cash



What's *Your* New Year's Resolution?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

WELL, IT'S A START. . .

Things that have changed this week:

1) I haven't had any soda or caffeine since Sunday. Lots of water, though. (And, lots of free Bud Light left from the party at my house on Saturday. I couldn't resist)

2) Although I was smoking like a chimney yesterday, I only had three cigs left this morning. Wish me luck, they should be my last.

3) I signed up for The National Body Challenge this morning. A free three-month Bally's membership, and the chance to be on TV? How can I resist? Now, I just need to find a workout buddy to keep my lazy ass in gear. Any takers, dear readers?

4) Had some issues with my impending resignation at Remy's. More on that later; right now, I'm off to shower, and get to work at SLUH.

And all this *before* New Year's. Pretty impressive for a procrastinator like me. Let's see if I keep up with it, eh, kids?

12/28/2003

WOW. EVEN *I* DIDN'T KNOW I WAS THIS MUCH OF A NERD . . .

Why, do you ask? Because I'm watching a round-table discussion of the Bar Association of Metropolitan Saint Louis.

Gotta love public access.

UPDATE, AFTER TEN MINUTES OF WATCHING: Apparently, this is like a "law primer" for the non-lawyer. Gawd, these people are boring. I'd hate to see them in the courtroom. And you'd think that a legal group would have better equipment. I think our high school public access show was better edited. Oy.

12/25/2003

UGH. WHAT A TRIP THIS HAS BEEN.

Holiday Party at Remy's: The night that wouldn't end. Met the woman who got the marketing job. A bit more of a slap in the face than a rejection letter, definitely. I'm thinking my time there is done. After the holiday party, we headed to Nick's Pub, and then Pop's. Then Courtesy Diner. I'm home at 7:30 am. My dumb ass decided to take a "nap" before work; I didn't hear my alarm; I woke up at 12:30. I called in, and didn't get a response; I'm assuming (and hoping) that my manager just went ahead and made the banks for tomorrow and Friday morning; I'll find out when I go in, I guess. Cross your fingers that I'm still employed by Monday morning.

I spent the day cleaning like a madman. I'm hopped up on caffeine, and can't sleep.

Oh, and I talked to Tony online tonight. Ugh. For some reason, he still gets to me. *sigh* Just in time for the holidays, my relationship self-esteem meter, which was slowly working its way back up, has plummeted slightly. Oy.

Happy Holidays, everyone.

[Listening to: Haven - Say Something - (03:22)]

12/15/2003

A FEW QUICKIES BEFORE BED:

Keith Olbermann and the writers of Countdown, I love you. The writing just seems to be getting better with time.

Interesting article about some possible competition for Job #2. Quite a bit of the crew (I recognized two of four in the accompanying photo) are taken from former Remy's Staff.

Confusing. Men are confusing. Nothing too bad, but this evening left me slightly perplexed.

12/12/2003

PARIS HILTON

I can't believe it. Someone sent me the link, and sure enough, here it is. Both Mirror Site 2 and Mirror Site 4 actually work. I can't believe this is such a big deal, because the quality is really crappy. I thought I'd post it, but not on my blog! Get it while it's hot, I guess.

12/10/2003

HRM. NO OPTIONS IF YOU'VE ALREADY HAD A THREESOME. . . OR TWO, OR THREE.


threesome



You Should Have a Threesome


You are sure to be a threesome pro (even if you're a first timer)

You're considering having a threesome for the right reasons

Not as a quick fix for a dull sex life or bad relationship

So grab the nearest hottie, and bring him or her into your bedroom

As long as your partner is game - you're sure to have a good time

Be safe, considerate, and don't end up sleeping in the wet spot :-)



Should You Have a Threesome?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

I SHOULD *REALLY* START CALLING AHEAD. . .

So, tonight I go into work.

For less than an hour.

For the third time in a week.

I think I'm actually losing money, when you include parking and gas, and the frustration of driving in Clayton Traffic.

At least I get to watch Ed.

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. . .

As the lovely Jen has reminded me, check out Jack Bog's Buck-A-Hit Day and help support the less fortunate in the Portland area. It's easier than those red buckets of the Salvation Army, without all the monotonous bell-ringing.

Oh yeah, and if you're curious to see if the Bogdanski family is reaching their 1,000 hits goal, scricktey-scroll all the way down, for a check at his sitemeter.
OK, I'VE DECIDED ON A NEW STRATEGY. . .

Instead of boring you with a play-by-play of my remaining days in London, I think I'll summarize instead. Seriously, rereading my posts, I'm damned near ready to fall asleep. So, instead of a play-by-play, lists fit my laziness much better.

Basically, there were a few surprises:

1) The Earl of Sandwich knew what he was doing. London's got a lot of pre-fab sandwich shops, and many of the combinations were delightful.

2) Nearly all gay men in London are named Steve. We met three in five nights.

3) Surprisingly, most of the younger generation and business professionals have pretty good teeth.

4) There's nothing more funny than hearing a drunk Brit yell out into the street as you walk past, "Via con Dios, you bastards!"

5) Additionally, if you talk about sex in the Tube station, you might get goosed in the behind by a very short old woman and her umbrella. She, however, had bad teeth.

I'm sure there will be more fun soon to come, complete with pictures that Greg and Robert took. Tonight after work, I'm planning on reworking on that damned MT installation.


Ok, that's all for now. I need food, laundry to attend to, and a few calls to make. I'm damned near done with the afore-mentioned Newsweek article, so expect some ranting later today.


REBEL WITH A CAUSE:

Before I continue on what might be a boring laundry list of things we did in London, you should know, dear readers, that I took a "me" day today. I've got lots of laundry, straightening up, etc. to catch up on, and I know that today was going to be a pretty easy day at work. Plus, I didn't sleep well last night, and today starts a long week or so of doing double time at both jobs. Thursday and Friday at Job #1, and Wednesday through Sunday at Job #2. Additionally, I've got a few resumes I need to send out, so I figured I can get 'em all done today. Keep your fingers crossed.

[Listening to: Stephen Lynch - My First Love Song - - (02:40)]
AND NOW, THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR. . .

or, at least Jen. It's a long one, so bear with me. (*giggle*)

Wednesday:

I'm hella excited, and can't wait to get out of work (partially, because, being the procrastinator that I am, I had laid out my clothes, but hadn't *actually* packed. Is anyone really surprised?), but am stuck until 2:30. Fume, fume, fume.

I rush, and get ready to be dropped off at the metrolink station. Of course, Dad's drunk, "but he's still here, take me to the airport." Mom nixed that idea, and I finally get to the airport, expecting it to be full of crowds running around like headless chickens. Instead, it's dead. We're talking slightly above tumbleweeds and crickets dead. But, while I'm there, I decided to get book onto a different flight, about an hour earlier. It's a longer layover in Chicago, but it's nice on the off chance I get stuck.

And then: our pilot's seat belt has "malfunctioned," so we're stuck in the plane, for over an hour. Most of the people there were not happy, as it was their last chance to connect to other flights. So I ended up at O'Hare 25 minutes later than I would have, had I stayed on the original flight. With the time I didn't save, I probably would've remembered to pack a) the three disposable cameras I meant to bring, and b) toothpaste. All well, such is life.

So, I get settled, and meet a nice cute girl, Victoria (or Vicki) that keeps me preoccupied in conversation for most of the flight. (Which reminds me, I need to send her a thank you card for the lovely time)

Thursday:

I'm now officially in a different country! I check in through customs, and go directly, without passing go, to the designated smoking section outside, to smoke like a chimney.

I tried to call ma mere but, apparently, my debit card wouldn't work in the phone. Sadly, while trying to call her, I left a copy of Posner's Sex and Reason somewhere in Heathrow. And with no Bookcrossing sticker. A damned shame.

So, I make it to the hotel with no problems, and experience my first ride on the Tube. I make it to our hotel, where I find out that Greg, Robert, and Derek have made it safely, and are lunching and/or napping. So, I grab a quick bite to eat, and just wind down, after calling Mom to let her know I made it alright. (My parents are worriers, and not much for airplane traveling, btw)

The boys get back, we explore for a bit, then head to LeHore for some decent Indian food. Our original plan: nap for a bit, then head out to the bars in SoHo. The reality: We all fell asleep, and woke up the next morning. So much for that idea, eh?

(This original post was planned on being much longer, and written much earlier, but I had some duties as a good friend to attend to, so I think I'll continue this tomorrow morning before work. You're right, Jen. I am a blog-tease!)

[Listening to: Evanescence - October - (06:27)]

12/09/2003

FOR THAT LARGE BANK OF GORE SUPPORTERS. . .

You've now got your official choice for president. It's Howard Dean, apparently. Initial reaction from Joe Lieberman: "What a schmuck. . ."

[Listening to: Stripper - lords of acid - farstucker (03:37)]
HEHE. AND BY REQUEST. . .

Tonight, with my large pile of laundry and clutter reaching full capacity, I'll be getting back into the blog groove. I'll have a recap of my London trip, as well as a random smattering of holiday fun, and some fun commentary about the current cover of Newsweek.

The funniest thing about my London recap: it took about three or four days of normalcy back in the States for me to actually have a clear memory of everything we actually did. Every day, I'd remember something else we did that I'd forgotten to mention to those at work and home that we anxious to hear all about it. Odd, eh?

[Listening to: Injected with a Poison (Digital Orgasm Rave) - Lords of Acid (Praga Kahn) - (03:15)]
HRM. ME THINKS THIS MIGHT BE THE PERFECT TIME TO APPLY.

In this morning's weekly employment alert from STLToday.com, I found this ad. I think with the very possible newspaper strike looming ahead, 'tis not a bad idea. I'm usually not a picket crosser, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

[Listening to: Speedracer Porn Mix - Lords of Acid - Etc (06:18)]
REALLY? I DIDN'T NOTICE AT ALL. . .

Note for those of you who've been hit by the traveling bug (like yours truly): Go to a place where the dollar is strong to avoid shock when you return, and balance your checkbook. Of course, it seems the options are limited these days. Road trip to Canada, anyone?

[Listening to: Let Me See Your Pussy - lords of acid - (04:04)]

11/30/2003

I'M HAVING A WONDERFUL TIME. AND I'VE GOT THE BLISTERS TO PROVE IT.

The past few days have been glorious. Despite a few showers here and there, the weather has been sunny to overcast, but beautiful all the same.

Yesterday, we went to Manchester, to indulge in the gloriousness of a soon-to-be closing Doc Martin's store. Two pairs of boots, including a lovely ten-eye pair that I've been salivating after for years.

We've also hit a few museums and churches. It's a bit odd to see actual working churches that have 1) gift shops or 2) tour plaques all over the place.

I've seen three, count 'em three OU fans here, designated by their outerwear. It's so much fun yelling, "Boomer!" and hearing a resounding "Sooner!" right back 'atcha. The Karen would be proud.

One more thing: if you're ever in Manchester, I highly recommend Mr. Thomas' Chop Shop. Wonderful beef and brown onion soup. Very yummy.

And on that note, I bid you adieu, as we're off to find food before the nightly drinking and dancing ensues.

11/28/2003

I HAVE ARRIVED.

Well, technically, yesterday afternoon. But kids, Naked Jay's in London.

The past two days have been relatively tourist-free, which is fine with me. Yesterday, we went to a nice Indian place, and hit a few of the queer bars, before (inadvertantly) retiring early to bed. Of course, my insomnia kicked in around 2 am, so I spent an hour or so reading in the hotel lobby, and of course, smoking like a banshee.

Today, we visited Cutty Sark and other Greenwich delights. Of course, my dumbass forgot my camera (and Greg's guidebook), so pictures will be few and far between. If you know me, though, you're aware I'm not much of a picture-taker as it is; it's not a bother, really.

Tonight, it's more fun queering it up with the guys, with a report to follow later. After a nice dinner at Wagamama, it's time for more drinking to ensue. Later, kids!

11/25/2003

JUST IN TIME FOR THE HOLIDAY SEASON. . .

The Gift that Keeps On Giving.
EXCITEMENT OVERLOAD!

Tracy Quan is going to write a sex advice column for Salon.com. Between Dan Savage and her, I'll definitely get my "other people's problems are funnier than mine" fix every week.
ONCE AGAIN, THE KKK PROVES THAT A MENSA MEMBERSHIP IS A PREREQUISITE.

Bullet fired during KKK ceremony hits participant

Nov. 24, 2003 | JOHNSON CITY, Tenn. (AP) -- A bullet fired in the air during a Ku Klux Klan initiation ceremony came down and struck a participant in the head, critically injuring him, authorities said.

Gregory Allen Freeman, 45, was charged with aggravated assault and reckless endangerment in the Saturday night incident that wounded Jeffery S. Murr, 24.

About 10 people, including two children, had gathered for the ceremony. The man who was being initiated was blindfolded, tied with a noose to a tree and shot with paintball guns as Freeman fired a pistol in the air to provide the sound of real gunfire, Sheriff Fred Phillips said.

A bullet struck Murr on the top of the head and exited at the bottom of his skull, authorities said.

Freeman fled the ceremony but was arrested near his home, authorities said. He was released on $7,500 bail.



I'M SINGIN' IN THE RAIN . . .

Just checked out the forecast for the trip. Rain, glorious, rain. Although, the wind will make it less "play in the rain" fun, I'll still enjoy the weather. And it makes it a lot easier to pack for.


THINGS THAT SUCK. . .

1) I've totally been MIA towards blogging in the past week, which will only be compounded by a trip to London over the Thanksgiving Holiday.

2) After picking up Greg at the airport at 3 am, two hours of sleep wasn't cutting it. So a "nap" at 7:30 last night turned into "bedtime," hence the 4 am random blogging.

3) I've been feeling that this week has been a long time coming, but it still came too soon.

4) I'm leaving tomorrow night, yet I've got three friends that are going through emotional crises of some sort, and I feel like I'm neglecting them.

5) I hate weird dreams that involve a combination of people who are actually in my life today, and people who've I've lost touch with from years ago.

6) Even after a busy week that made it seemingly impossible to blog, I feel like there really hasn't been much going on.



11/21/2003

HEHEH. . .

I know Dan Savage has a great point in this Salon.com article, but the phrase (totally taken out of context) "This means we're going to be seeing a lot more of . . . Santorum frothing on the news, aren't we?"

Hehe. Yes, if you read the article, you'll see I removed a key word from the quote, but that was still the first image I had, even at this early hour. Disgusting, but funny.

11/19/2003

LONG DAY. TIRED. POST MORE TOMORROW.

But, huzzah for Massachusetts. More thoughts on it when I'm a bit coherent.

11/17/2003

TV WATCHING. . .

So, I just clicked on my TV, and one of my favorite candidates for President, Carol Moseley Braun, is on Hardball. Now, granted, I don't think she has a snowball's chance in hell of getting the Dem nomination, we tend to see eye to eye on a lot of issues, and she's got that nice mixture of Midwest sensibilities and Chicago street smarts. Of course, there was that whole "scandal" about misappropriation of funds. . . me thinks that'll have a large part to play in the fact that she won't get the nomination. Plus, I think that the party's still a little afraid of another Geraldine Ferraro situation, where a woman on the ticket will let the Republican steamroll their way to a win.
WE'RE INVESTIGA-AWESOME!

Check out the New Strong Bad Email to brighten up your day.

11/15/2003

HEHE. PROOF THAT I'M WEIRDER THAN THE AVERAGE PERSON.

Just took a Morality Quiz, with the results posted below. Kudos to Jen for the linkage.

Taboo - The Results




Your Moralising Quotient is: 0.07.

Your Interference Factor is: 0.00.

Your Universalising Factor is: 0.00.

What do these results mean?

Are you thinking straight about morality?


You see very little wrong in the actions depicted in these scenarios. However, to the extent that you do, it is a moot point how you might justify it. You don't think an action can be morally wrong if it is entirely private and no one, not even the person doing the act, is harmed by it. Yet the actions described in these scenarios at least seem to be private like this and it was specified as clearly as possible that they didn't involve harm. Possibly an argument could be made that the people undertaking these actions are harmed in some way by them. But you don't think that an action can be morally wrong solely for the reason that it harms the person undertaking it. More significantly, when asked about each scenario, in no instance did you respond that harm had resulted. Consequently, it is a puzzle why you think that any of the actions depicted here are of questionable morality.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Analysis: Morality, Taboos and the "Yuk Factor"

Probably most of us would like to believe we are able to give good reasons for the moral judgements that we make. For example, if we were asked why it was wrong for the older girl to push the younger boy off the swing, as described in the first question of this activity, we might talk about the fact that the boy's rights had been violated or about the fact that he experienced at least some physical harm. Whilst it is true that the philosophical waters would soon become muddied if we examined our reasoning more carefully, we are able to give at least prima facie good reasons for our judgement of moral wrongdoing.

However, there is a class of activities where it is much more difficult to offer arguments to support a judgement of moral wrong. This is the class of activities which are harmless (at least in a narrow sense), private and consensual, yet violate strong social norms. The examples we utilised in this activity were to do with the taboos and rituals associated with death, food and sexuality.

No doubt some people will suspect that we have constructed this activity with the intention of showing that people are just mistaken if they think that things like having sex with a frozen chicken are wrong. This is not the case, since it is possible to at least make arguments that such things are wrong. Here is an example of one such argument. Human beings are God's creations. Their sexuality is a gift from God to be enjoyed only in the context of a monogamous union between one man and one woman. Chickens, frozen or otherwise, are not part of the picture. Therefore, to have sex with one is to abuse the gift of sexuality, and will necessarily harm a person's relationship with God. It follows that having sex with poultry is a moral wrong.

So if the intention then is not to show that the moral prohibitions surrounding taboos cannot be justified, what are we trying to show with this activity?

Morality and Harm

The intention is to demonstrate that there are tensions in the way that people reason about morality. One important tension has to do with how central the idea of harm is to many moral frameworks. Previous research suggests that, with the exception of the siblings story, most people judge the scenarios presented here to involve neither harm to the protagonists nor to anybody else; but that, regardless, plenty of people still think that these scenarios depict acts which are morally wrong (see Haidt, Koller and Dias, Affect, Culture and Morality).

This activity asks people precisely to make judgements about whether acts can be wrong if they harm only the protagonist and whether they can be wrong if they harm no-one. If the answer to the second question is "no", then automatically any claim that the scenarios presented here involve moral wrongdoing results in difficulties. To retain a consistent moral outlook, it would be necessary to show either that there is harm in the acts depicted here, or to revise the judgement that some kind of harm is necessary for moral condemnation. Both resolutions contain philosophical complications.

There is harm in the acts depicted here

This will probably be the most popular response amongst people who think that their moral outlook has been unfairly identified by this activity as involving a possible contradiction.

There is no doubt that it is a defensible position to argue that there is harm in the acts depicted here. However, it is not an easy argument to make. Primarily, this is because these scenarios have been set up precisely in such a way so that it seems that no harm has occurred. The protagonists suffer no ill-effects as a result of their actions and their actions remain private. Given this, any argument that harm occurs is going to be very difficult to ground empirically. However, this is not to say that it cannot be done, simply that it is something which will require a good deal of thought.

The other point to make is that it is possible that a judgement that harm occurs is an ex post facto rationalisation of a prior intuition that the acts depicted here are morally wrong. In other words, people don't like things like incest and sex with poultry, they are pretty good at inventing stories to explain why they don't like them, but, in fact, they don't like them regardless. We already know that people engage in this kind of retroactive reasoning when justifying their responses to taboo type stimuli (see Haidt, Koller and Dias). We also know that judgements of wrongdoing by people who take a moralising stance towards the kinds of acts depicted here are better predicted by asking them whether they would be bothered to see these acts than by asking them whether anyone is harmed. The suspicion, then, is that a judgement that harm occurs is simply a buttress of a prior baseline moral commitment.

Harm is not necessary for moral condemnation

It is possible to argue that there is no harm, nor possibility of harm, in the actions depicted here, and yet they are still wrong, by insisting that harm is not necessary for moral condemnation. But again there are difficulties with this kind of argument.

The major problem is the danger that it will deprive the justifications offered for particular moral judgements of any real content. For example, whilst it is easy enough to claim that siblings should not have sex with one another because it violates the rules governing human sexuality which have been laid down by God, it is much more difficult to show what is wrong with violating these rules unless one talks about harm (though, of course, there is nothing to stop one simply asserting that it is wrong to break rules). Thus, one finds the idea in Christian theology that Man is harmed by his sins in that they constitute a barrier between himself and God.

Some philosophers have gone so far as to suggest that a notion of "harm", understood in a certain kind of way, is a prerequisite of proper moral reasoning. For example, Jeremy Bentham, the founder of classical utilitarianism, argued that pleasure and pain (a "positive harm"), instantiated in the notion of utility, are the only proper measures of value. In his terms, then, a wrong act is one which increases pain (or which, given equally possible choices, results in the least pleasure). Although utilitarianism has moved on since Bentham's day, it is still possible to find philosophers who are willing to argue that pain (and, by implication, a certain kind of harm) should be the central concern of moral philosophy. Richard Ryder, for example, in Issue 23 of TPM, argues that "our prime moral duty is to reduce the pains of others and especially of those who suffer most."

Of course, this is not to argue that these philosophers have got it right, and that some conception of harm has to be central to the moral judgements that we make. Rather, it is simply to claim that if one wants to argue that an act can be wrong without harm, or the possibility of harm, then it is necessary to think carefully about how one justifies the attribution of wrongdoing, in order to avoid at least some notion of harm - however broad - entering into the moral calculus.

The "Yuk Factor"

The other tension in moral reasoning that we hope this activity helps to elucidate has to do with the role of reason and emotion in moral judgements. One of the interesting things which Haidt et al found when exploring people's reactions to the scenarios featured in this activity is that people who have very strong emotional responses to these stories frequently find it difficult to provide an explanation or justification for what they are feeling. According to Steve Pinker, this is because our moral convictions are rooted not so much in reason, as in the evolutionary make-up of our minds. In his words: "People have gut feelings that give them emphatic moral convictions, and they struggle to rationalize them after the fact. These convictions may have little to do with moral judgements that one could justify to others in terms of their effects on happiness or suffering. They arise instead from the neurobiological and evolutionary design of the organs we call moral emotions." (The Blank Slate).

The dangers of rooting moral attitudes in emotion are obvious. It means that a "yuk-factor" might lead us to condemn actions - and even people - we have no good reason to condemn. For example, consider the fate of the untouchables in the Indian caste system. They were not allowed to touch people from the higher castes; they were not allowed to drink from the same wells; on public occasions, they had to sit at a distance from everybody else; and in some regions, even contact with the shadow of an untouchable person was seen as polluting and necessitated a purification ritual. Such prohibitions might sit easily with a certain kind of raw sentiment. They are much harder, if not impossible, to justify in the light of reason.

However, one must be careful not simply to assume that emotion has no role to play in moral reasoning. Indeed, some philosophers claim that it is just a mistake to think that moral judgement involves anything other than emotion. A. J. Ayer, for example, in line with the dictates of his logical positivism, argued that ethical statements are nothing more than the expression of emotional attitudes. He denied that it was possible for ethical statements to be factually true. Rather, they are exclamations of the form 'Hurrah for X!'.

Even if one does not accept this kind of extreme "emotivism", it is still fairly easy to see that emotion can play some kind of role in good moral reasoning. Empathy, for example, would seem to be an important component of a proper moral outlook. It is hard to imagine that the atrocities of the holocaust would have occurred had its protagonists been more able to imagine themselves in the emotional position of their victims. Indeed, the philosopher Jonathan Glover has argued that many of the atrocities of the last century were possible precisely because people's moral emotions had been switched off.

Nevertheless, it is probably right that we are suspicious of moral judgements which are rooted in the "yuk-factor". Steve Pinker, in The Blank Slate, puts it like this: "The difference between a defensible moral position and an atavistic gut feeling is that with the former we can give reasons why our conviction is valid. We can explain why torture and murder and rape are wrong, or why we should oppose discrimination and injustice. On the other hand, no good reasons can be produced to show why homosexuality should be suppressed or why the races should be segregated. And the good reasons for a moral position are not pulled out of thin air: they always have to do with what makes people better off or worse off, and are grounded in the logic that we have to treat other people in the way that we demand they treat us."

How did you do compared to other people?

Taboo has been played 3571 times.

Your Moralising Quotient of 0.07 compares to an average Moralising Quotient of 0.25. This means that as far as the events depicted in the scenarios featured in this activity are concerned you are more permissive than average.

Your Interference Factor of 0.00 compares to an average Interference Factor of 0.12. This means that as far as the events depicted in the scenarios featured in this activity are concerned you are less likely to recommend societal interference in matters of moral wrongdoing, in the form of prevention or punishment, than average.

Your Universalising Factor of 0.00 compares to an average Universalising Factor of 0.35. This means you are less likely than average to see moral wrongdoing in universal terms - that is, without regard to prevailing cultural norms and social conventions (at least as far as the events depicted in the scenarios featured in this activity are concerned).



WELL, PALBERT, IT'S FINALLY HAPPENED.

A new Strong Bad Email! Life is good.

11/14/2003

JUST SO YOU KNOW I'M NOT DEAD. . .

Jay-sus. It's been quite a while since I've posted, let alone posted something worth reading. And. . . it'll probably have to wait till tomorrow, at least, although Saturday is a much more plausible date to shoot for.

Basically, it boils down to this: I've worked every night this week, closing on three of them. I work tomorrow. I've been working about 30 hours a week at the daytime job. And my dad's still a prick, but that's a story for later this weekend, when I'm a bit more ready to delve into the soap opera otherwise known as "Living with your Alcoholic Father Sucks Ass." (Really, you should check it out sometime. It's an Emmy-winning show. No laugh track, fortunately.)

Oy. Plus, MT + my hosting company = headaches for Jay. I'm going to try to work out more kinks on that in the next few days, as well.


But for right now, it's a few Nutcracker Ales and Pizza Rolls in an attempt to get to bed soon.


(I know. . Pizza Rolls?, you ask. . . well, I'm all about good food. But sometimes, you just want cheap, quick, and easy. Hehe. My motto on so many things in life, eh?)

11/10/2003

TWO QUICK THINGS BEFORE BED. . .

Well, actually three:

1) Go to Kirk's for dinner, next time you're in St. Louis. Good food, entertaining customers (there was a gay couple, obviously on a first date. Gay #1: Loud, obnoxious, and wouldn't take time to breathe for fear of missing out on time to talk; Gay #2: Bored out of his mind. I think we might have seen him yawn if Greg and I weren't trying to be inconspicuous in our gawking)

2) Rent The Italian Job. Beautiful people (Charlize Theron, Jason Staham) and Beautiful Cars (The New MINI Coopers) are a good combination.

3) Don't say I've never done anything nice. I was picking out some movies yesterday, and found the only copy of Finding Nemo in the store, deep amid the "recently returned" pile. A small girl asked the counter for a copy, and they searched frantically for the *one* copy they had listed in the store. I surrendered it, because I thought the little moppet was going to cry.
I got a free movie out of the deal, because, as the clerk who checked me out put it, "Most people would've horded their copy like assholes."

I would say I should be a nice person more often, but then I think it would ruin my fun when I do something dastardly evil. *grin*

11/08/2003

OY.

What a week, kids. Busy, busy, busy with work, and more work. And of course, what would Jay's life be without familial drama? Full story in a bit; right now, I'm off to get some food, and shower. Also, I've got hardly anything to do for the next few days, so hopefully, i'll get past my MT woes, and the new site will be up this weekend.

[Listening to: Say Something - Haven - (03:23)]

11/03/2003

UGH.

I'm sure it's from something I ate last night or yesterday, but I really needed this* while driving to work this morning. Most definitely not a pleasant way to start the day, or the work week.

I'm going back to bed.

*Probably Not Safe for Work, or Safe for those who have any decency at 10 am.
FOURTEEN HOURS LATER. . .

Oy.

Despite breaks for naps, food, and smokes, I think I've finally figured out what's been going wrong with my MT installation. SO. . . .

I'm going to completely reinstall everything on the server, now that I've configured my MySQL databases to what's needed. (I think.)

Hopefully, by this time tomorrow, it'll all be finalized. But for now, off to bed!

[Listening to: Different Situation - Athenaeum - (04:04)]

11/02/2003

SIGNS THAT I SHOULDN'T EAT PAST 2 A.M., OR HOW MY PARANOID DELUSIONS GET THE BEST OF ME

For the past two nights, I've had weird dreams about security issues and my computer. Friday night, it was a dream about a random AIM user stealing all my credit card information; Last night, it was a weird virus getting into my computer, and emailing all my friends lots of porn.

I've absolutely NO idea why I'm having these dreams, but I've been running Norton like a mad man every morning, just in case.

[Listening to: You're So Damn Hot - OKGO - (02:40)]
GETTING THERE. . .

The new blog location should be up pretty soon. I'm in the process of uploading MT to my server as we speak, so cross your fingers, that I did everything right. Of course, the *real* hassle will probably be changing over from the Blogger codes to the new codes.

I'll keep you updated on the happenings as they happen.

BTW, for those of you (e.g., Jen) who are questioning the move, seeing as how I've not been updating much lately: I've finally made the switch in hours at Job #2, so I'm only working there three nights a week, and five days at Job #1. Huzzah! More time to rant!

[Listening to: Wheel - John Mayer - Heavier Things (05:33)]

11/01/2003

HEHEHE.

So, I'm watching Undergrads on DVD, and they're doing the episode about sex ed. Their R.A. just handed out free condoms and a pamphlet about STDs which reads, "V.D.: Two Letters That Can Burn!"

What a great way to start the day.

[Listening to: Clarity - John Mayer - Heavier Things (04:32)]

10/31/2003

A HAPPY HALLOWEEN, INDEED.

My last scheduled Friday night at Job #2 was tonight, and was blessedly short, as we only had a handful of reservations. I was sent home after an hour, and headed directly to bed. (I needed a nap; I didn't sleep well last night, and probably would've been running low if we had a busy night at work)

But now, I'm awake, and debating what to do now. I *could* clean my room (not bloody likely); I could screw around with MT, which I've yet to even touch, or I could just sit on my ass and watch movies.

That third option is sounding more and more appealing.

And although I didn't go trick-or-treating tonight, or have a fun party, I found out what I *should* have dressed up as tonight, thanks to Quiz Diva:

firefighter



You Should Dress Up As a Firefighter!


Sexy, confident, and naughty.

You're meant to prance around in this skimpy coustume...

Going on and on about "big hoses"



What Should You Be For Halloween?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva



[Listening to: john mayer - Comfortable (live and long intro) - - (09:07)]

10/30/2003

ONE QUICK ONE BEFORE I HEAD TO BED. . .

I'm too used to Lisa. Tonight, there was a customer at a table that was breast-feeding at her table. My waitress was disgusted, to say the least, but it didn't bother me a bit. *shakes fist at La Leche League*

[Listening to: Clarity - John Mayer - Heavier Things (04:32)]

10/29/2003

NO, I'M NOT DEAD, AND MY FINGERS HAVEN'T ROTTED AWAY. . .

It's just getting to this new "50+ hours a week via two part-time jobs" schedule. Most of my free time between jobs has been spent either 1) eating, 2) sleeping, 3) running various errands, or 4) all of the above.

Oy. However, you'll be happy to note that I woke up extra early this morning. . . so pre-work blogging should take effect soon. Additionally, I'm looking for my imminent move to Movable Type to take place by the end of next month. . . but you know what a procrastinator I am, so don't be heartbroken if it doesn't happen. ;)

Sadly, the computer in the cash room at SLUH (hereby referred to as "Job #1," because it's the first job of the day; guess what Job #2 is?) does not have internet access, or I'd be blogging a bit more during the day. Besides, at this point, I really don't have the time to blog at work; I tend to work my scheduled five hours each day straight through.

Speaking of employment news: I'm still waiting to hear back from the corporate office about the marketing interview last week, but, in a predictable turn of events, if I do say so myself: Job #1 has already tentatively discussed hiring me outright. When it rains, it definitely DOES pour for me, doesn't it?

[Listening to: Everybody Walk the Dinosaur - Was Not Was - (04:22)]

10/26/2003

HELLO, PEOPLES!

For those of you who might be interested in a little news of the outside world, the Guardian has recently done a piece on St. Louis Forest Park. Did you know that the day Forest Park was dedicated, Gen. George Custer was getting his butt kicked by all the Indians in the world at Little Big Horn? And that crews fixing up the park sometimes dug up unexploded shells from war games played out in the park? Forest Park garners 12 million visitors a year, that's a lot!

The things we never knew about our lovely little park.

10/25/2003

WHAT AN ABSOLUTELY BUSY WEEK. . .

Sorry for the lack of insightful ranting and opinion.

It's been a crazy week, to say the least. Lemme try to break it down for you:

This weekend was fun-filled times: hanging out with friends, computer upgrade insanity, and ending with my first day at a new temp job, and dinner and drinks with Jen.

The week continued with work during the day, finally my interview with the company on Tuesday, then off to Remy's for more work.

Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

That was my week in a nutshell. Most days I had enough time to steal in a quick nap for an hour or so between jobs, but other than that, I've hardly had the time to check my email, let along blog.

It'll get better, I promise. Once I get a little more used to this "waking up in the morning" thing, I'll be sure to get a few more posts in before work each day.

[Listening to: James - Laid (Acoustic) - - (03:41)]

10/16/2003

HUZZAH! ONLY ONE MORE STEP TO GO. . .

The UM System has finally added "sexual orientation" to its non-discrimination policy. Now, if only SMSU would follow suit . . .
AND TO ADD TO MY DISAPPOINTMENT. . .

I was so proud of myself, as I was planning on taping "Ed" last night. However, I apparently forgot to set my clock back an hour for DST, so I missed it completely.

If it's not one thing, it's your mother. . .

Ooh! But I just saw an advertisement on Food Network, and Good Eats is now on every weeknight at 10:30! Huzzah!
JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT YESTERDAY COULDN'T GET ANY WORSE. . .

The interview was cancelled for today. I've got to reschedule, because the interviewer is having car trouble, and is at home today. Sounds like a personal problem, not my problem. Just another list of the unprofessionalism I've gotten this week. Arrgh.

Although, on the bright side, I was the only one on the floor last night, as Rob was sent home. So I made some decent cash, and I should do the same after closing tonight. Two days left until a nice three day weekend! Huzzah!

10/15/2003

MOVIN' ON UP. . . TO THE EAST SIDE. . .

Coming soon: a new home. It's going to take a bit for me to figure out how to upload, etc. Plus, I'm making the big move to Movable Type, eventually, after I tinker around with how to use it.
CHICKENS COUNTED: 1; EGGS HATCHED: 0

This morning, I recieved this email, after a thoroughly confusing evening:

"Jay,

I don't know if my partner got in contact with you or not, but the client actually went through another source to fill this position. Sorry about not calling you but I've been extremely busy. We'll keep you in the pipeline for other opportunities that come open."

ARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!

Now, once again, I'm in an all-or-nothing situation. Here's hoping my interview tomorrow goes ridiculously well.
WAIT, WAIT. THERE MUST BE SOME MISTAKE.

First, my blog is rated a paltry PG-13, and now this:

This site is certified 14% EVIL by the Gematriculator

This site is certified 86% GOOD by the Gematriculator

Kudos to my favorite Birthday Girl for the linkage.

10/14/2003

WHEN IT RAINS, IT POURS, EH?

So my schedule keeps changing. I'm still supposed to start the temp assignment tomorrow, but on Thursday, I *finally* have an interview with the corporate office. Yeesh. The only thing that would make it even more convienent is for the PD to call, and try to schedule an appointment for Friday.

10/13/2003

GREAT WEEKEND, KIDS.

Worked Saturday night, got off around 10, and met Greg and his friend Derek at Freddie's. It's been quite a while since I've queered it up at a gay bar, so I thought it would be a nice change of pace.

Not five minutes after I meet up with them, a tall, stocky grey-haired man strikes up a conversation with Derek. In an attempt to pawn off the conversation, he introduces the man to Greg and me. The mystery man's birthday was Saturday, and he is ridiculously excited that one of us is named Jay, as he is. He inadvertantly mistook Greg for Jay, and lunged forward to kiss him. Greg then points out that *I'm* Jay.

Of course, I wasn't really paying attention to the drunk man, until he grabs my face and tries to kiss me. He then replies, "Oh, Daddy!" and tries again. Both attempts fail, and I'm scarred by the fact that a man who was easily in his late 30s/early 40s called *me* "Daddy."

Yikes.

Sunday was a long day, with a day trip to Hermann, MO with Greg, Tina, and a handful of Greg's friends (most I've met quite a few times already). It was a long day of wine, tours, food, and good times. Tina and I were so tired after we got back, that we missed Brian's birthday drunkfest at Lafayette's. (It didn't help that I'd only gotten about three hours of sleep Saturday night. Add in the long work week I've had/going to have, and you can understand why I was so tuckered out.)

So, Happy Birthday, Greg. And sorry for missing yours, Brian.

10/11/2003

OH YEAH. . .

Since it's technically Saturday: Happy Birthday, Brian.
LOONG NIGHT, BUT FISCALLY WORTH IT, I GUESS.

Ideal Scenario: Come in at five, the other two bussers join me at 5:30 and 6:00, respectively. With six servers, I'd have a small section, but that means I'd get off relatively early.

Reality: Come in at five. We're a server short, so there are five sections, slightly larger than normal. I then find out that the busser who should've been the closer called in with a migraine. The other busser working with me wants me to close, since he's running a 5k tomorrow at 6 am.

I close. I wait on one final table that takes forever, and doesn't leave until 1:30. I come home with about $80. Here's hoping Joe's feeling better tomorrow, because I'd rather not close four nights in a row (Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Monday nights).

Also, I got a "real" job. Well, kind of. It's doing some data entry and clerical work through Accountemps for a company in NoCo. Although I *really* am not looking forward to the drive, I am looking forward to a steady paycheck for the next 6 weeks. I was starting to get a bit nervous on how I was going to pay for the London Trip. I figure I'll take-home at least $1000 by the end of the assignment (which, ends very close to Thanksgiving, I'm assuming, so that also works out smashingly), and that will be enough for the hotel, food, and spending money for the trip. Huzzah!

However, I had to inform the new GM that the assignment starts next week, so I won't be able to work Wednesday lunches for a while. She was *not* happy about it (way to make a good first impression, huh?). I think it pissed her off because of the short notice, but the lunches aren't really worth it for me, anyway. On a really *great* shift, I might take home $20 in tips, but it's usually more like $10.

Let's do the math: Turn down a 40-hour week job, paying $10.something an hour, OR keep my part-time job happy by working one four hour shift once a week, and making squat. I think it's obvious which one I chose.

And on that note, I'm going to eat my giant peanut butter cookie I picked up at 7-11, and head to bed.

(Oh, and for those of you that know what I'm talking about: Because of work, the DTR was a no-go. So I'm still in the dark. It'll keep for a while, I suppose.)

I am *so* getting in that hot tub tomorrow.

10/10/2003

UGH.

Why is it that some ideas sound like good ideas until you go through with them?

Case in point:

Eating an Ultimate Cheeseburger from Jack in the Box.

I truly feel like my heart will explode in any minute. Damn you, Jack in The Box! Why must you be sooo good, and yet sooo bad for me? *shakes fist in the air*

[Listening to: James - Laid (04:19)]
GRR. SOMETIMES I DON'T LIKE SUCH OBVIOUS REMINDERS THAT I'M SUCH AN IDIOT.

I've been thoroughly enjoying the last three discs of the SportsNight series, but I just realized that I accidentally have been watching the season out of order. I've just finished the last disc in the series, and found out that I completely missed disc 4. So I've got six episodes still to watch, although I already know what's going to happen later in the show. Arrgh.

All well, it's enjoyable anyway.

[Listening to: Unrequited Orchestra of Locomotion - OKGO - (03:54)]
MARRIAGE PROTECTION WEEK, 2003

I'm so glad there's something to celebrate during this week; three friends birthdays just wasn't enough.

Kudos to GregUnderwater for the linkage. Check out his humorous banners while you're at it.
[Listening to: The Nearness Of You - - (03:07)]
HRM. NOW I HAVE A REASON TO DRIVE TO WENTZVILLE . . .

There's a new haunted house in town, "The Mall of the Dead," and it's in danger of being shut down because of some adult scenes.

Although the owner says "This isn't about safety; this is about censorship pure and simple."

Yes, it is. But it doesn't matter; the citizens of Wentzville could possibly shut it down, with enough outcry. According to a 10-year old Supreme Court ruling, because the amusement site does not meet acceptable "community standards," it's considered obscene. Luckily, it's doubtful that people under the age of 18 are probably not directly acting in the scenes, otherwise, they'd have a child pornography case on their hands as well.
[Listening to: god put a smile upon your face - Coldplay - A Rush of Blood to the Head (04:59)]

10/09/2003

OCTOBER'S LOOKING PRETTY GOOD, IN ALL AREAS.

I'll prove it to you. Check out my horoscope for this month.

[Listening to: She And Mr Jones (uncensored) - Lords Of Acid - Heaven Is An Orgasm (04:51)]
VIA THE ONION:

Girlfriend Dumped After Forwarding Stupid Link

GREAT FALLS, MT—Amanda Manis was dumped Monday after forwarding boyfriend Anthony Madrid a link for the humor web site LunaticLobsters.com. "I was convinced that I had found my soulmate, my kindred spirit, the woman I could grow old with," Madrid said. "Then, out of nowhere, Mandy e-mails me this stupid link. When I saw those Flash-animation cartoons, I knew it was over." Madrid has previously dumped girlfriends for owning roller blades, buying Vegemite, and watching Craig Kilborn.

More "Dating Dealbreakers," courtesy of Salon.com.

[Listening to: Bombs Over Bagdad (Rock Remix) - Outkast - (04:34)]
I'M SO JEALOUS.

Karen and Kerry went skydiving this weekend. Yet another one of those things to cross off on my before-I-die-to-do-list.

[Listening to: Quiet - John Mayer (03:21)]
THE GROCERY STRIKE CONTINUES

And, at least according to an unscientific poll on STLToday.com, we're nearly evenly split between crossing the picket lines, and shopping at 7-11.

I'm curious if the strike will prove the fears of The Big Three Chains: will Wal-Mart, Sam's Club, Costco, and the like be able to keep customers who stray? I know that the stronghold of the Union and their stores are part of the reason why there's no Wal-Mart Supercenters within the city limits (although I've also heard that Wal-Mart refused for years to build in a major metropolitan area, because it went against the "home-town" [read: "small town"] feel of the corporate mission. I think that's probably untrue). There was always a fear that the cost-cutting methods of Wal-Mart and the Warehouse stores would drive sales down in the supermarket chains, as customers would go strictly to where the prices were lower.

I guess we'll find out if their fears were unfounded, or a real entity to compete against.
SO CALIFORNIA'S GOT A NEW GOVERNOR. . .

Over at The Volokh Conspiracy there's mention of a proposed constitutional amendment that would allow foreign-born citizens run for the Presidency. I think it's a great idea. Our country's history is seeped in the many cultural backgrounds we have; it seems to be a plausible next step. (Also, the first few presidents weren't natural-born citizens, if you think about it)

Besides, we already recognize the many foreigners who emigrate to the U.S. every year, and the importance their cultures add to our society; why else are we one of the few Western countries that doesn't have an official language? (English is recognized as a standard language of communication, and many states have legislation stating that the official language of their states is English. But officially, people in the US can speak whatever language they want.)

I think that between the recall, and this proposed amendment, we're getting to some core values of the type of democracy the Framers envisioned: the ability of the voting body to choose (and recall) their elected officials, and the freedom to find a balance between "American" culture, and the culture of their ancestors.

(Now, if we could only nix DOMA, we'd have the freedom to marry who we wanted to, as well)

Oh, and for those of you who enjoy the freedom of mocking newly elected officials, I give you President Bush's welcoming speech to Governor-elect Schwarzenegger.

[Listening to: O mio babbino caro (Puccini- Gianni Schicchi) - Renee Fleming (02:55)]
GREG, ARE YOU UP TO THE CHALLENGE, AGAIN?

Because I'm a big politics nerd, and I like drinking games, I most *definitely* want to play the Democratic Debate Drinking Game. Think of all the fun we had with the State of the Union Drinking Game!

Of course, just like last time, I'm busy tonight, but we can tape it, and hilarity can ensue after my crazy two weeks at work. Besides, I think I'll need to get nice and drunk after this is all over.

You think you'll be able to finish the entire game, buddy boy?

Kudos to Jen for the linkage.

[Listening to: I Believe I Can Fly - Me First And The Gimme Gimmes - Take A Break (03:01)]
TWO DOWN, NINE TO GO. . .

And hardly any cash to show for it. So far, my 10-day non-stop workathon has been pretty easy. I was sent home hella early on Tuesday night, and left by 9:30 last night, but I'll make up for it, when I close tonight. I've got a few calls to make RE: the impending job hunt, and a few things to blog about today. So, on with the show, eh kids?

[Listening to: Coldplay - The Scientist - - (05:09)]

10/08/2003

HEHE. NO COMMENT.

thirty four people



You Will Have Sex With 34 People!


For you sex is an adventure

One that you'll get quite good at

It's not to say that you'll have sex with anyone

But "self control" is just not in your vocal



How Many People Will You Have Sex With?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

10/07/2003

HRM. . .

swimming position



You Should Try Swimming!


Close and intimate. Cuddly. Missionary with a twist.



Here's how to do it:



The guy lies on his back and spreads his legs.

The girl gets on top of him, her legs along his, her feet on his.

The girl controls the pace of sex by dragging herself up and down against him.



The girl can vary the position by closing her legs tight, while his remain spread.

Or the guy can close his legs, while hers are spread.



What Sex Position Should You Try?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva


Done, and done. One question on here (8. Teach it to your friends!) reminds me of a trip to Tulsa I took with Jaimee one time. Hehehe.

10/06/2003

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF SAVAGE LOVE:

Yes, we can get a little Dan-lovin' each week, but I've also found, recently, that Dan Savage writes a weekly column for gay/planetout.com. Check out the archives, even if you're not queer and/or queer-friendly. It seems to me that relationship problems tend to be universal, going across orientations.

[Listening to: to where you are - Josh Groban (03:54)]
YOU KNOW IT'S A SIGN OF A GOOD TIME. . .

When you're literally laughing the entire ten-minute ride home.
ON THE JOB FRONT:

I've applied for a job with the STL Police Department, as a "Telephone Report Specialist." It basically entails transcribing non-emergency reports from the telephone. I had to take a grammer grammar test today, and scored pretty well. (BTW, knowing how to spell "grammar" was one of the questions. I think if you get that wrong, you should be automatically considered out of the running for the job.)

I'm still waiting to hear back from the Marketing Position at the Corporate office. I'll be giving them a call tomorrow to figure out what the hell's going on.
THINGS HAVE BEEN PRETTY HUMDRUM 'ROUND HERE THE PAST FEW DAYS. . .

Lack of posting = lack of anything going on in my life + laziness to come up with anything fun to talk about.

My nights have been consumed with work; the first few discs of the Sports Night DVD set, ala Netflix; spending time with friends (one in particular; those of you in the Inner Sanctum know who I'm speaking of); and random acts of cleaning.

And it all ends: tomorrow. I'm picking up weekend shifts for Brian, as a birthday present for him (Seriously, dude. Don't expect a present. Maybe a card, but that's it). Here's how my next two weeks are shaping up:

I work Tuesday night; a double on Wednesday; Thursday night; Friday Night; Saturday Night. Sunday is a trip to Hermann, MO with Greg and his friends to celebrate his birthday on Monday, probably followed by $1 bottles at Lafayette's. Monday night is (hopefully) lunch or some other such quality time with Jen while she's in town, and then the whole cycle repeats till Friday. That's 10 out of 11 days of work. So, as you can imagine, my posts will probably be (even more) few and far between.

In lighter news, I saw Lost in Translation on Friday, which is an excellent movie. Also, thanks to Brent, I've acquired 106 condoms. I'd have to have sex once a week, for two years, to even come close to finishing all these. I think that sounds like a formidable challenge. I'll keep you posted on how I'm doing towards finishing them off. ;)

Also, in a fit of self-promotion, check the post below about Raising the Bar. I've thought about joining, but my blog's a pseudo-wannabe-blawg, at best. I'm often too lazy/uninformed to give actual posts about the law, but the weekly selection is definitely intriguing.

SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION

I wanted to clue in the Naked Jay readers to a new feature over at my site, which I call "Raising the Bar." It's a weekly collection (posted each Monday) of pertinent, provocative, or particularly well-written posts from the legal blogosphere. The submissions are either self-nominations or suggestions by readers about other people's pieces. Feel free to stop by, peruse the offerings, and make suggestions of your own for next week.

10/03/2003

AAAAGGGGH.

Tonight was absoutely hellish at work. Thursdays are usually one of the busiest nights for us (although these past few weeks have been DEAD), and I was the only one there for most of the night. Brian was shuttled off to do a catering job until around 8:30ish, so for the first three hours, it was me, and only me. He came back and helped out for an hour or two, which at least helped me get caught up. I made some pretty decent cash because of the wonky staffing tonight, but it's only a little helpful, seeing as I've been bringing home ridiculously low tips for the past two or three weeks.

And now, off to bed. Or attemping it, at least.

10/02/2003

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A GEEK

Begging to Differ has the Fall Movie Geek Preview, check out the immense amount of geekiness coming soon to a theater near you!

BETTER ROMANTIC THAN DRUNK!

romantic kiss



You Are a Romantic Kiss!


You are an idealist, and unsurprisingly, you give the ideal kiss

Your kiss causes almost anyone to fall in love with you

And to be honest, you need to be falling a little to let your lips loose

No biggie… your kiss is worth the wait :-)



What Type of Kiss Are You?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva



Take that, Jay!

10/01/2003

WOW, I SHO' WAS BITCHY THIS MORNING. . .

Or at least judgemental.

To apologize, I'd like to say I love you, dear readers. (NSFW, speakers required)

Kudos to Brent, my favorite So-Cal boy, for the linkage.
WHAT A WHINER.

An article in today's Salon.com asks Since you asked. . . 's Cary Tennis about being in love with a best friend: (Log in as a Premium member Day Pass, if you'd like to read it in it's entirety; my apologies to salon.com for reprinting)

Dear Cary,

How do you suggest "curing" yourself of being madly, completely and obsessively in love with one of your best friends, with whom there's absolutely no chance that it will move beyond anything but friendship?

I'm a gay man, and almost two years ago, my boyfriend of five years suddenly dumped me, proclaiming his newfound heterosexuality; he was in love with one of our mutual, female friends. They have since gone on to have a wonderful relationship and are now expecting their first child. This threw me into a tailspin. I was devastated and no longer speak to either one of them. But in the last two years, I've managed to somewhat make my peace with the situation and have started to forgive them both. But herein lies the problem.

Around the same time as the breaking-up trauma, I made a new friend through another friend I already had. Despite the fact that he was "straight" and had a girlfriend, he was very flirtatious, touchy, sensitive and very, very attentive. I began to get "signals," and I started imagining scenarios of him rescuing me from my pain and bewilderment. After several months, I could no longer take it and broke down to him in the middle of a restaurant during dinner, confessing that I was in love with him and knew that he had feelings for me as well, and I was very curious as to what was going to happen. He was shocked. He had no idea he had sent me mixed signals and was heartbroken that he had unintentionally led me on. In retrospect, I realize that this is just his personality, and he treats all of his male friends this way.


We have continued to remain friends since then, and have grown extremely close, but the problem is that my feelings still remain and are stronger than ever. I've tried dating other people, but no one (no matter how great a person they are) can measure up to him. He's everything I've ever wanted in a lifelong partner, and being around him brings me such joy and hope, but also makes me extremely depressed. At this point, he is much more of a hindrance in moving on from my failed relationship than my ex-boyfriend ever was.

I've tried distancing myself, but he and I are both totally wrapped up in the same social group. Besides that, I don't want to. I would still prefer him in my life as a friend than not at all, but his friendship keeps me from moving on. This has been torturing me for nearly two years now, and I'm starting to think I'm using it as a "crutch" or an excuse to not get close to people that could hurt me again. I'm sure this is probably a fairly textbook situation, and I would love to hear your thoughts on it.

Straight Chaser


Cary's response, prefaced by a lame attempt to be Mr. Blue (Sorry, you're no Garrison Keillor), is to "break up" with the friend.

My response:

Get over yourself. You're not the first person who this has happened to, regardless of your sexual orientation (or your friend's). I think everyone's had a little crush on a friend at one time or another. And the idea that you're comparing the people you date to this friend? I know that there are different qualities of many of my closest friends that I also look for in a romantic companion. Our friends make us feel special, and it would be silly not to search for that same special feeling with a lover. But to discount all the people you date because they're not your fantasy of "the one?" Do you really think that if you could date this friend, that the experience would be anything like the one you've already envisioned? Doubtful. You'd just end up resenting him because he didn't measure up to your dream of a romantic encounter.

Granted, the fact that your former boyfriend (I'd assume he's your first homosexual relationship) decided that he was more bisexual then homosexual, and is married with child could be considered a little traumatic. But if anything, you'd think that experience would lead you to try to stray away from (yet another absurd fantasy) of "turning a straight boy gay." You already know first hand that a person's sexual identity isn't necessarily static, but fluid.

You are the stereotypical whiny fag who's always alone that noone can stand to be around, yet feel bad if they ignore you. Go die alone in the rain, already.

*WHOMP*

And now that I've jumped off my soapbox for the day, I'm off to shower, head (back) to work, and work a double shift. Adieu, dear readers!
I BLAME THE "POINTS" GAME FOR MY RESULT.

drunken kiss



You Are a Drunken Kiss!


You are an impulsive kisser - kiss first, think later

And sometimes you end up suffering from a little kissing amnesia

It's all good though… your little condition allows you to kiss freely

Without headache or heartache the next morning



What Type of Kiss Are You?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva


Well, for the most part, anyway. Kissing, to me, can be something special, for those really great kisses, or just something that's done during truth-or-dare. I'm not one who thinks kissing is only reserved for the one your dating/sleeping with/whatever, but at least reserved for someone who you've got at least *some* kind of comfort level with.

9/30/2003

THANKS TO MICHAEL FOR THE LINKAGE:

Athena
Athena


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Also, welcome back to the world of blogging, Mike. You've been missed.

9/29/2003

I AM SO UTTERLY BORED.

And the worst part about it? I've got a laundry list of things that I *should* be doing:

- Laundry

- Resume-whoring

- Cleaning my room

Instead, I'll probably just fuck around on the Internet, maybe watch a movie.

Although, I'd much be watching the newly-acquired Rocky & Bullwinkle DVD's that a certain someone I know owns.

9/26/2003

SIMPLY IRRESISTABLE.

Robert Palmer dies at age 54.
LAST NIGHT. . . SUCKED. A LOT.

First of all, business was (once again) horribly, horribly slow. So slow that we had maybe four new tables for the late-night Happy Hour. Four. (BTW, Happy Hour on Thursdays is from 10-midnight. We had live music, belly dancers, and a late-night tapas menu.) Our restaurant is usually packed on Thursday nights.

I leave the restaurant around 1:30, and am on my way home. Traffic in Clayton is pretty non-existent, and I made a bit of a "rolling stop" at Bonhomme and Hanley (A flashing red light). No cop, no stop, right?

But guess what. There WAS a Cop. Who presented me with two tickets. One for "missing" the stop, and one for expired plates. (Oops. I knew that'd catch up wih me eventually.) How nice.

Then, because I was so fucking stressed out about that, I started itching like crazy, and couldn't sleep.

The only bright part about last night? I'm nearly done with the 4-disc set of Six Feet Under, from Netflix.

I *really* need to find another job. Ugh.

9/24/2003

HRMPH. IF IT'S VALUED THAT LOW, CAN I CASH IT IN? I REALLY NEED A NEW CAR.

Your soul is worth ?12535. For your peace of mind, 69% of people have a purer soul than you.

Kudos to Jen for the linkage.

9/23/2003

*GIGGLE*

Via The Infinite Teen Slang Dictionary:

naked jay
n. a vulgar hand gesture.
"Are you giving me the naked jay, Shana?"

tripod mafia
v. to laugh at something in an expensive fashion.
"I can't believe Nigel tried to tripod mafia!"

library dallas
interj. expression of disbelief.
"Bud, I just saw Mom and Shana, going to attack a woman!" "Library dallas!"

chud to the max
adj. like a thong.
"Brian, what happened? Your disco is chud to the max!"

Really. It doesn't get funnier than that.

Kudos to Karen for the linkage.

9/19/2003

AHH, ANOTHER WAY TO WASTE TIME.

The Family Guy Reference Archives. It doesn't get any better than that.
WORK SUCKS.

Ok, not work, per se, but the fact that we've been so damned SLLLLOOOOOW this week. I've closed every night this week, and every night, they've sent people home early. Which means lots of hours at work, for not a lot of money. (No tips.)

In other work-related news, I had an interview yesterday, to sell insurance, of all things. I should hear back by today or monday about a second interview.

Whatever.

[Listening to: Sweetness - Jimmy Eat World (03:39)]
FUN URBAN MYTH OF THE DAY:

Last night, at work, I heard an interesting lil' rumor:

The Tivoli Theatre sign looks somewhat similar to a penis. (Check out the picture in the link. . . you can see the connection, even if it's a stretch. Heheh. A "stretch.") "Tivoli" spelled backwards is "I Lov It."

Rumor has it that the original owner was gay, and the sign/name connection was a little inside joke about his homosexuality.

I'm not sure if this can ever be confirmed or denied, but I thought it was an interesting tidbit to pass along. Even if only my fellow St. Louisans find it mildly interesting.

*shrug*

[Listening to: neptunes - Rock Star - nerd_(the_neptunes) (04:30)]


9/18/2003

"DAMMIT, I'VE RUN OUT OF QUARTERS!"

Interesting article in Salon.com today, about the possible outsourcing of retail workers to robots. One expert says that robots could be used for foreplay:

But, unfortunately for human workers, those lovable robots are getting better all the time. ASIMO, a robot created by Honda, can walk on two feet, just like humans. The thing is so lifelike that scientists in India have determined that, in addition to walking, ASIMO could be good for more intimate tasks. "One of the reasons for marital breakups today is physical inadequacy. Couples are so stressed out that there's no time for foreplay, so essential to get the juices flowing. A smart machine can bridge that gap in no time," Dr. CRJP Naidu of Bangalore's Centre for Artificial Intelligence & Robotics told the Hindustan Times. Not long ago, Brain saw an article in Popular Science about a robot scientist who'd created an extremely humanlike robotic face -- "a real face, with soft flesh-toned polymer skin and finely sculpted features and high cheekbones and big blue eyes," the article said. (Emphasis mine.)

Hehe. Could you imagine? Surge protectors in the bedroom, for your foreplay buddy, and your other lil' buddy. . . prostitution is as accessible as your local video arcade (with the right amount of quarters) . . . think of all the bi-curious people who could take the plunge, try it out without the awkwardness of a human partner. . .

Although. . . if robot prostitutes look as good as Jude Law, ala "A.I.", that might not be such a bad thing.

9/17/2003

WHAT'S NEW PUSSYCAT?

Work was pretty good last night. We got done relatively early (a little after 11), Al Franken dined in our restaurant (although he was in Brian's section, so I've got no interesting stories), and I made decent cash last night.

Also, I watched Permanent Midnight, finally available after seeing "Long Wait" in my Netflix Queue. Great movie about the dangers of drug abuse. Plus, Elizabeth Hurley and Maria Bello are totally hot.

My life is so exciting.
"THE MORE ACCURATE YOUR WATER, THE FASTER YOUR LIZARD CLIMBS TO THE TOP."

Yes, you shouldn't take that phrase out of context, but I think it's funnier that way. Check out this week's Suburban Fringe.

9/16/2003

YIKES.

Really, there's much else to say after reading this week's Savage Love.

9/15/2003

THANKS TO JEN FOR THE LINKAGE:

General asshats
Circle I Limbo

Rednecks
Circle II Whirling in a Dark & Stormy Wind

Hipsters
Circle III Mud, Rain, Cold, Hail & Snow

The Pope
Circle IV Rolling Weights

Parents who bring squalling brats to R-rated movies
Circle V Stuck in Mud, Mangled

River Styx

Republicans
Circle VI Buried for Eternity

River Phlegyas

George Bush
Circle VII Burning Sands

Militant Vegans
Circle IIX Immersed in Excrement

NAMBLA Members
Circle IX Frozen in Ice

Design your own hell



I DO like how "General Asshats" is it's own category.
TEE HEE . . .

New Teen Girl Squad! What a wonderful way to start a Monday.

Also, check out Odd Todd, for a glimpse into how I spent the majority of my summer.

9/14/2003

ALMOST BETTER THAN SEX. . .

I just had a nice 1 lb Ribeye, cooked medium rare, with some nice gorgonzola on top.

Heaven!

(Ok, so it's not the most enthralling news, but I figured at least a few of you readers are foodies, and would like to know.)
IT WAS THE BEST OF TIMES, IT WAS THE WORST OF TIMES. . .

Yesterday was the 5th Annual HOP in the City, a wonderful beer festival held on the grounds of the Schlafly Brewery downtown.

35 beers! A free tasting glass! And (by the time we got there) three hours to sample them all!

So Tina, Greg and I head down around two. The fun began when we showed our tickets, and our I.D.'s. Commentary from the door man was as follows:

When he looked at my ID: "Oh, you're much closer to 21 than I would've thought."

When he looked at Greg's: "Oh, you're much older than I would've thought."

Hrmph. I'm hoping that means that I'll age gracefully . . .

Beer, beer. Glorious beer! They went in order by the seasonal selections each month, so we just went through the year, sampling and resampling as many as we could. There were quite a few darker beers, so I was in heaven.

Additionally, there was lots of nice eye candy for all three of us to enjoy. :)

I mentioned to Greg how great it was that when someone dropped their glass, the crowd responded with boos and "awww"s to show their disdain, for wasting such wonderful free beer.

Then, while Tina went to the bathroom for the third or fourth time (for those of you who know Tina, and her tiny bladder, this shouldn't be much of a surprise), it happened.

I was holding both her and my glasses, and. . . I dropped one.

It was a sign of the embarrassment that would ensue for the rest of the day.

Greg and Tina laughed a lot, as did the crowd, and my face got pretty red, as usual.

We head out, and decided to have dinner at Space, an out of the way restaurant on the edge of the Hill.

Of course, it didn't open until 5:30, and we had a half an hour to kill. So we head up the street to Rigazzi's. Well, since they're the home of the "Frozen Fishbowl," I had to indulge in a fishbowl of beer. Ugh. What a mistake. I had forgotten how large they were, easily a quart of beer.

It was all downhill from there.

We headed to Space, and all the beer from earlier today + the Fishbowl + lack of food during the day all hit me. I knocked over (and broke) my water glass, once again to my embarrassment. (That would be 2 for 2, for those of you keeping score at home)

The food was alright. The pasta with mushrooms I had was palatable at best. The alfredo sauce was runny, and the pasta was cooked well past al dente.

But it sobered me up pretty well. At least, enough to make it home, and nap for about four hours, waking at 12:30, which was about the same time Greg did, as his voicemail mentioned. I call him back, we chat for a few minutes, and then I attempt bed again.

All of a sudden, my stomach felt like it was going to implode. I quickly remembered what large quantities of beer does to my GI system, and headed to the bathroom, where I stayed for at least an hour. I won't go in to details, but it was NOT the best way to end such a fun time.

I finally make it back to bed around 3 or so, and sleep fitfully until 1:30 this afternoon. All in all, it's been a great weekend so far. Definitely one for the record books.

[Listening to: Intergalactic Guerilla - Beastie Boys/Rage Against the Machine - Unreleased (03:29)]

9/11/2003

CHONG'S BONGS . . .

Tommy Chong has been sentenced to nine months in federal prison for selling "drug paraphenilia". What a crock. Those bongs, if like any other head shop, are clearly marked "for tobacco use only."

Besides, is anyone really surprised that either Cheech or Chong would smoke pot?



9/10/2003

WEIRD COMBOS. . .

I've been getting some interesting topics for the ads above this blog lately. For quite a while, I was seeing lots of ads for Alcoholics Anonymous, which makes sense, seeing how much I talk about Dad, or going out.

But today, I've noticed on multiple page views, ads about lesbians.

Wha. . .? Granted, I've always been a fan of lesbians. Lesbians that I've met usually have the right amount of (stereotypical) masculinity and feminity that I find attractive in most people I've dated or been friends with.

I guess now wouldn't be the best time to mention I just watched the DVD of The Vagina Monologues, eh?

9/09/2003

"THANK YOU FOR MEETING WITH US. . .

. . . to discuss the Records Clerk Position.

Your interest in our firm is appreciated, but we selected a candidate whose experience more closely matches our needs. We will keep your resume in our files for three months in the event that we can consider you for another position.

We wish you much success in your job search."

Can anyone find the mistakes in this letter?

1) "A candidate whose experience more closely matches our needs." -- I guess they found someone who spent their years after college in the Peace Corps, teaching impoverished countries how to organize file folders in both alphabetical AND numerical order.

2) "We wish you much success in your job search." -- Apparently, not enough to actually offer me a job.

This job got me so nervous yesterday, that I've been broken out in hives since last night. (Although I slept well; I think I'd rather have insomnia than hives that make me look freakish)

Maybe I should put that on my resume next time under skills: "Can work self into such a frenzy over a position that applicant can acquire allergic reaction. Applicant hopes to be able to acquire spontaneous combustion for next party trick."

9/08/2003

*SIGH*

What a crappy first post to make for the day.

But. . .

The firm didn't call today. I'm assuming that means I didn't get the job. Apparently, they found someone else who was more qualified to file documents.

Hopefully, I'm being prematurely pessimistic, and they just didn't have time to call. But more than likely, I'll get a rejection letter tomorrow.

<whine> But I'm tired of looking for jobs. Tired of going on interviews, only to find rejection letters waiting for me. Just imagine what would happen if I were applying for jobs that actually required a college degree? </whine>

I guess I"ll be giving you the offical update tomorrow, when the mail comes.

I've got a few more things marinating in my head, but they're not quite complete. Look for a new update either later tonight, or in the wee hours of tomorrow morning.

9/05/2003

OK. WELL, AT LEAST THAT'S SOME KIND OF NEWS. . .

End of the day today, or Monday at the absolute latest. Keep your fingers crossed, kids. I might gets me a job sooner or later, eh?
CURSES! FOILED AGAIN. . .

Yeah. So my plan to get up at 7 am. . .

It obviously didn't work.
WOW.

I promise, this is my last post about the movie I've been watching (and is keeping me up). Check out the deleted scenes. The Boat Scene? I've had pseudo-relationships like that (uh, John, anyone? Of course, only Jaimee and Jen will get that one, but it's OK). But I'm not as nearly crazy as either of them.
JESSICA STEIN UPDATE:

Ooh. Ok, I'm going to ruin it for some of you who haven't seen it. But I'm an asshole. But it even deals with Lesbian Bed Death! (And luckily, this article describes how to fight it, for those readers of you who might be going through that sort of thing.)
SO I'M NOT ASLEEP YET. .

Because I'm watching Kissing Jessica Stein which, is about two women who try dating women (namely, each other) just to try out the options. I'm not going to ruin it for you, but this movie just proves, again, that bisexuals rock. Now, if I could only convince the rest of the world. . .
DRUNK PEOPLE ARE THE MOST OBSTINATE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD

And I think tonight proved that. One of the servers, drunk on wine and some such other alcoholic beverages (it's what he does after every shift), and was arguing with our bar manager about some of the policies and practices of our company. It was obviously an argument that was going nowhere.

This fact, of course, was pointedly made as I gave my drunk co-worker a ride home. He just wouldn't shut up. He had a point, and obviously he was right, even though I tried to play devil's advocate. Whatever. I told him that although he had a valid point to make, he was awfully rude to Jay (yes, the other bar manager's name is Jay. I'm constantly turning in circles whenever anyone calls "Jay!"), and needed to apologize. Of course, said co-worker would have none of that.

And tonight's going to be a bit of a test. I told Brian I'd work for him tommorrow morning, for lunch shift, so I'm trying to get to sleep, get up at 7 am, and try to get on a semi-regular schedule, which I'll have to do, if/when I ever get the full time job, I'll have to deal with lack of sleep a couple of nights a week anyway, right? Might as well get used to it now, eh?

Speaking of full-time jobs:

NO.

They haven't called me back. I'm trying again tomorrow. Those bastards. I interviewed last Wednesday, and still no word. Grrrr.....

9/04/2003

HRM. SADLY, I THINK IT DEPENDS ON IF I'M TIRED OR NOT. . .


slowly undressing



You Are Slowly Undressing Someone


Your foreplay is slow, seductive, and totally transparent.

When you want some, you take action!

And you turn your lover completely on in the process.



You've been known to undress with your teeth -

And kiss all over. If it involves talent and time...

Well, let's just say you have plenty of both.



What Kind of Foreplay Are *You*?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

9/03/2003

TEMPLATE WOES. . .

Well, not really.

But if you'd like to see what my template is supposed to look like, hop on over to Rob's World. Besides being a fan, he seems like a pretty nice fellow. Checkitout, willya?

[Listening to: Chemical Brothers & Moby vs. Fatboy Slim & Prodigy - (04:49)]
ANOTHER REASON I'VE BEEN A SLACKASS. . .

Besides general laziness, I've been caught up in some movies and some books from the library. Good times.

I just finished watching Date Plate. I think it's a great show, because everyone loves someone who can cook. Admit it.

It reminds me of recent episode of Coupling, a BBC show which I've recently discovered (and is being rehashed on NBC this fall.). One of the main characters, Susan, is cooking dinner for her first date with Steven. Her best friend Sally's response (I'm probably paraphrasing a bit, but you get the idea):

Sally: Cooking dinner for someone means, "Let's have sex."
Susan: No, "Stay the night," means have sex.
Sally: "Stay the night," means let's have sex, but "I'll cook dinner for you," means Let's have sex, and I'll cater.

Truer words have never been spoken.

Oh, and speaking of TV, Ed, one of my favorite shows, is NOT moving to the dreaded Friday night slot that reeks of future cancellation. Good job, TV execs. Now, I've just got to get some blank tapes, so I can start recording this season on a regular basis.


[Listening to: Violently Happy - Bjork + Depeche Mode - (07:22)]