WHY DO I FEEL LIKE I HAVEN'T GOTTEN A DAMNED THING ACCOMPLISHED TODAY?

I finished about a month's worth of laundry, did dishes, cleaned my bathroom, put up yet another section of fence, worked on getting the hot tub prepped for wiring, and somehow, managed to eat a meal or two today.

But I'm still feeling like there's so much more I could've done. Hrm. It's the most productive I've been in weeks, and it's not enough, somehow.

WHAT ABOUT "ASSHAT?"

New words are added to the Dictionary.

BLOGGERS GAIN LIBEL PROTECTION

Here's the article, via Wired.com.

For those law nerds like me who are reading this, here's the Opinion in Batzel v. Smith. Gotta love Findlaw.com, eh?

UGH.

Things that suck:

Searching for jobs
Doing laundry
Doing Dishes
Daytime Television
Boredom
The Unknown

And now, ladies and gentleman, you realize how my day's been going.

PromoGuy's Monday Mission 3.26

When was the last time you said or were told the following, and more importantly, how did it feel to be you at that moment:

1. "It's not you, it's me."
Hehe. When I say it, my immediate first thought is: "Actually, it IS you. If the problem wasn't you, we wouldn't be having this discussion." When someone says it to me, I agree. . . It's DEFINITELY them, not me.
2. "I love you, but I'm not in love with you."
I think this one is a valid excuse/reason/point. Because, there is a difference, although in most cases, it's hard to differentiate between the two.
3. "You just don't get it!"
When it's said to me, I'm thinking that I'd get it, if you explained it correctly. When I say it, I'm trying to figure out a way to explain it better.
4. "Do I look fat..."
Depends on who says it. I'm close enough to most of my friends, that if they're wearing something that doesn't look good om them, I'll be the first to tell them. But if it's said by someone I'm dating. . . hey, if you'll lie to me, I'll lie to you.
5. "I hate you!"
Probably not as much as I hate you.
6. "If you really loved me..."
". . . then you wouldn't try to put a guilt trip on me?"
7. "Not tonight..."
Fine. I prefer morning sex anyway.

BONUS: If we can solve any problem, then why do we lose so many tears?
Hrm. I don't know about you, but the last time I really cried over anything was the day I found out about Dad's bypass surgery. Before that, I probably couldn't tell you.

Today's Comment Question: Do you like watching fireworks?
Ehh. . . Depends on my mood.

CHRIS COTNER, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

In case you haven't noticed, my post comments have been deluged with pleadings to go to askcotner.com. Supposedly, it's "the coolest site I've ever seen!" So, Senor Cotner, what's the dealio? do you want me to submit some witty, humorous story, or are you just trying to spam my blog to increase your own traffic?

Oh, and about last night's post. I'm feeling fine now. I just get hyper-emotional sometimes when I've been drinking. (Of course, most of you know that, especially if you've seen my 21st birthday video)

WHY DO I FEEL TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT, ALREADY?

Just for future reference, kids:

I understand subtlety entirely too well. There's no need to make obvious points with me. Actions speak a helluva a lot louder than words. Just ask dad.

New Diaryland post, for those few people who are lucky enough to have a password.

(PS. I'm feeling a bit bitchy at the moment, but all will pass by tomorrow, I promise.)

Addendum: I couldn't post this at approximately 3 am on Sunday morning. It's about 9 am now, and I've calmed down quite a bit, but I thought it'd be best to show my original thoughts, even if I couldn't post 'em.

GRRR. . . SO MUCH FOR HAVING FAITH. . .

So dad hadn't drank since Monday (the drinking-my-$40-bottle-of-wine-event), and he even went to AA on Tuesday. However, since we did so much work today, he felt the need to reward himself with a shiny new 12-pack of what he calls beer. Ugh.

I'M A BIT TUCKERED OUT. . .

After a long night up, watching movies and bad TV, followed immediately by a drive back into the city, and seven straight hours of putting up a fence. . . I'm a bit beat. Now *I'm* the one who's in need of a massage. (that was a subtle hint to faithful readers in the St. Louis area)

Now, off to shower, and unwind a bit after a day of digging holes, mixing and pouring cement, and screwing. (Get your minds out of the gutters . . . on second thought, think all the nasty thoughts you want, it's been a while.)

I'm also keenly aware that I haven't brushed my teeth today. Yeeech.

MMM. . . LIVER MOUSSE. . . SOUNDS SCRUMPTIOUS. . .

So do you think these recipe cards from Weight Watchers were effective in the 70's? Yes. Because the nausea consuming your body will make you never want to eat again.

Kudos to Chris for the linkage.

PS. I think the ProTemps interview was a complete waste of my time. We'll see, I guess.

ALL OF THE BLOGOSPHERE IS A-BUZZ. . .

I'm planning on writing my reaction to the Supreme Court decision on Lawrence v. Texas. However, I'm currently readying myself for an interview with yet another temporary agency, Pro Temps.

But to satisfy your craving for discussion, check out Chris at uffish, the analyses at Legal Theory Blog and The Volokh Conspiracy. I'll write more after I get a chance to read all the opinions again.

Note to Justice Scalia: You're an asshat.

GRRR. . .

So, I'm getting ready to wash my car, and I'm looking for the cd player, usually housed in the shed. And what do I find? A half-empty $40 bottle of wine, next to a Guinness pint glass that amazingly didn't break on the concrete floor. (Both owned by me.) Jesus. Do we have to lock up any liquor in the house so my fuckin' dad won't get to it? This is absolutely ridiculous. He's getting an earful when he gets home from work. I'm livid right now.

BOB, I FEEL YOUR PAIN. . .

This week's Suburban Fringe brings up a pretty common phenomenon in my life. . . forgetfulness. Why is it that I usually either do something smart, or something using common sense? I never seem to have both. hehe.

Ugh. Insomnia sucks. Fell asleep around 5, up by 8:30. Life sucks. Oh, and I forgot to bitch about having to pay for *two* one-way tickets for the Metrolink last night. When did they get smart and start checking tickets?

And, courtesy of Jennifer, I give you indepth analysis of my LJ name, if I had one. I tried two varieties to see if there was a difference:

nakedjay Magic Number 20 Job Actor Personality I'd Quite Like One Temperament Cool And Calm Sexual Gay Likely To Win Some Lubricant Me - In A Word Divine Colour Brought to you by MemeJack

nakedvoyeur Magic Number 18 Job Politician Personality The Glass Is Half-Empty Temperament If I Lose It - Run Sexual Straight Likely To Win The Lottery Me - In A Word Genius Colour Brought to you by MemeJack

Interesting, eh?

IT'S BEEN A LOONNGG NIGHT. . .

Went to the Cardinals game tonight with Steph, Matt H, & AmieandJulian (one word, because they're joined at the hip and in luv). After 14 innings, they lost to the Reds. Big surprise. I don't think I've ever been to a Cardinals game when they won. I'm bad luck, me thinks.

In other news, I'm publicly apologizing to Jennifer for being an asshat. Here's hoping Big Brother didn't get tipped off.

MR. GREEN, IN THE HALL, WITH THE REVOLVER. . .

I've just finished watching Clue: The Movie, and I'd forgotten how funny it is; it's got a great ensemble cast, and some great one-liners. Of course, my favorite quote is Ms. White (Madeline Kahn), discussing her hatred of the maid, Yvette, who cheated on her with her former (and now deceased) husband:

"Yes . . .

(pause)

Yes, I did it.

I killed Yvette.

I hated her . . . so . . . much . . .

I-It-It--flame--flames . . . on the side of my face . . .

breathing . . . breathle--heaving breaths . . .heaving--"


But does anyone remember the Clue VCR Board Game? Like the author of this review, it came out when I was five or six, and was ridiculously hard to follow, and quite boring. We threw it out after our Panasonic Top-Loading VCR ate the video cassette up.

Good times, good times. . .

ACTUALLY, I THOUGHT OF ANOTHER NAME FOR THIS PAST WEEKEND. . .

Porn Weekend. Two of the movies we watched were Pornstar: The Legend of Ron Jeremy and The Pornographer. Both of them show the positive and negative sides of porn, and are very well balanced.

HEHE. . . I'M PICTURING ANDY AND SHANE, HOW BOUT YOU?

Leave it to Chris to make me giggle like a school girl.

AND THE WEEKEND O'JAIMEE COMES TO AN END. . .

After lots of DVD watching, lots of gastronomic delights, and lots of deep belly laughs, Jaimee's nearly home, as we speak. The weekend ended with my friend Joe, her, and I watching lots and lots of Strong Bad Emails I think we both needed this weekend; it had been two long since we've had some time together that wasn't entirely rushing around, or trying to entertain each other's friends. We just got to goof around like in the old days, and laugh so hard our stomachs hurt. All in all, a spectacular weekend, and now it's back to the old grind of job searching.

QUOTE OF THE EVENING:
"I like my guys with nice bodies and not-so-nice faces." -- Stephanie

Last night, the wedding went off without a hitch. The bride looked beautiful, of course, I was a social butterfly, as usual, and then we went to Tequila Wyld, on Ladies Night. As my Voicemonkey entry last night shows, I wasn't having a very good time. But all and all, it was a good night.

Voicemonkey Message: 0306220202

BTW, I mention a Mooch lookalike, and her sister Julie. My phone was cutting out, but Julie's probably 19 or so by now, and she's just as adorable as Mooch is. If you're wondering why it's so quiet, I was out on the patio to get away from the ridiculously loud bass and the obnoxious, nauseating DJ.

AN UPDATE OF THE RECENT ROE V. WADE FILING:

From Findlaw.com:

Fed Court Declines to Reopen Roe V. Wade

A federal district court dismissed a request by the one-time plaintiff known as "Jane Roe" to reconsider the landmark U.S. Supreme Court decision that legalized abortion 30 years ago.

The court said late Thursday that Norma McCorvey's request wasn't made within a "reasonable time" after the 1973 judgment in Roe v. Wade.

McCorvey, who joined the anti-abortion fight 10 years ago, filed the "motion for relief from judgment" Tuesday, asking the court to reopen the case and conduct a wide-ranging inquiry into scientific and anecdotal evidence that she says shows abortion hurts women.

"Whether or not the Supreme Court was infallible, its Roe decision was certainly final in this litigation," Judge David Godbey wrote in the ruling. "It is simply too late now, thirty years after the fact, for McCorvey to revisit that judgment."

Read the entire AP article.

FUN, FUN, FUN, PLUS LOTSA FOOD.

So, it's been an eventful few days with Jaimee in town. Wednesday night, we hung out with Greg at Freddie's, where I kicked Greg's ass in two games of darts. (However, we won't talk about my shoddy pool skills.) Last night, we went to Cunetto's for lunch, and Emperor's Wok, a combo Chinese/Mongolian BBQ restaurant. In between lunch and dinner, we napped. Afterwards, we met Brian, Joe, Jacob, and Kim (old high school friends of mine) at Soulard Ale House, and then Kim, Jaimee and I headed to The Upstairs Lounge for a little dancin, where we had a considerably better time than the last time we went.

Today, after a whopping two hours of sleep for me (hello insomnia!), we went for a tour of the Washington University School of Law. Jaimee and I were most impressed. And her meeting with the Associate Dean of Admissions was hopeful that she'll get in eventually, but just has to wait.

We then walked around on the Loop for a while, then ate at El Burrito Loco. Now, we're hanging out and watching DVDs, and probably will nap some more.
Tonight, homemade Hot Wings, and then some kind of party time with Steph and Matt.

Tomorrow, we're off to Soulard Market and The Arch, before Jaimee leaves, and I head to the wedding. Fun times, fun times.

And Finally:



How Do You Rate?

Kudos to Chris for the linkage.

APOLOGIES IF THERE'S NOT MUCH POSTING THIS WEEKEND . . .

Jaimee's in town till Saturday, or Sunday if I can can convince her, so I'll be spending most of my time trying to show her fun things to do in the city, or just goofing around. Last night, Greg and Stephanie met her, and they approve wholeheartedly. Huzzah! Anyhoo, I'll post all of the fun later on Monday.

SO WAS ANYONE EXPECTING THIS?

Just weeks after the House passes a "partial-birth abortion" ban, the plaintiff in Roe v. Wade has filed a Relief from Judgement Motion, stating that new medical facts not available in 1973 prove that legalizing abortion is detrimental on a federal level, and should be returned to the states. For the full text of the motion, click here.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. Since I've always grown up around the pro-life/pro-choice debate, I see both sides of the issue. But I still think that equal access to reproductive rights, for those who choose to use them, is necessary. If it is handed back to the states, that access may be lost.

GRRR. . .

Blogger is pissing me off by proxy. I convinced my friend Chris to start a blog, and it has completely dissapeared from his blog list. And I've no idea how to fix it.

IN HONOR OF MY ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY INTO BLOGDOM. . .

I give you: 100 things or so about Jay, that you may or may not have known:

1. I was born nearly three months premature. I was a lil' squirt, weighing in at 2 lbs, 4 oz.
2. I was named after Jay North, the star of the TV show "Dennis the Menace". Ironically, I'm not a blond.
3. My middle name, Patrick, was the name of a former boyfriend of my mother's.
4. I was baptized when I was four years old.
5. I have an older half-brother, Jeff, and half-sister, Julie, from my father's first marriage. However, according to the Birth Order Book, I act more like an only child.
6. I've got a niece, Nikki, and two nephews, Danny and Kevin, children of Jeff.
7. I'm a Gemini. Everything you've heard about Geminis are true. We're fuckin crazy.
8. I tend to not wear underwear, except for formal occasions.
9. When I do wear underwear, they're usually boxer briefs.
10. I get crushes easily. Infatuations are second nature to me. However, they are usually fleeting, as I get bored, and move on.
11. I've been in one major relationship.
12. Although I deluded myself after we broke up, I probably was "in love" during said relationship.
13. Although I've only been in love once, I love many people.
14. My "magic number" is more than five and less than 30. That's all I'm saying.
15. At last count, I've got over 40 "brotherhood points".
16. Some of those points have included more than kissing.
17. I've never gotten negative brotherhood points. I at least wait until they're inducted.
18. I didn't get my driver's license until I was 19.
19. I had my first accident less than a year later.
20. My first car was the Pimpmobile.
21. "Pimpy" was a 1980 Oldsmobile Ninety-Eight, complete with Vinyl seats and an eight-track player.
22. I lost my virginity when I was 20. It is inadvertantly commemorated on a road-trip T-Shirt.
23. I'm not much of a cuddler, but I always feel better when there's someone sleeping in bed beside me.
24. I want to go skydiving.
25. I also want my nipples pierced.
26. I've never been to a foreign country.
27. I don't own anything with gay pride rainbows on it, and don't plan on it any time soon.
28. I once contemplated becoming a priest. In my youth, I thought the ceremonies and rituals were beautiful.
29. That was a short lived option as career choices.
30. I don't like eggs. Except in French Toast, which I don't think counts.
31. I took four years of French in high school, and don't remember any of it. Except "Will you go to bed with me?," and "Where's the bathroom." I feel that's all I really need to start any meaningful conversation. :)
32. I've never broken a bone, surprisingly.
33. I want to learn how to play the following sports: Golf, Rugby, Polo, and Cricket.
34. I collected baseball cards as a child.
35. I hold grudges for a long time. I tend to be bitter like that.
36. I'm left-handed.
37. I bat right-handed in baseball.
38. My first crush were the Koettker Twins, two girls who were seniors, and the lust objects of many at school. Simultaneously, I also thought their brother was cute too. The signs were there from an early age.
39. Although I've had my slutty phases, I have total respect for monogamy. Open marriages are not the way to go with me.
40. That being said, I've had group sex in the past.
41. I have prehensile toes.
42. Before I die, I want to train myself to write with my toes, just as a fun party trick.
43. Speaking of party tricks, I can stick my whole fist in my mouth.
44. However, I feel I'm not very good at fellatio.
45. From my understanding, I *am* very good at cunnilingus.
46. I'm horribly ticklish.
47. I've had chicken pox.
48. My tonsils have been removed.
49. I busted my eardrum when I was 17, while water-skiing.
50. I'm not a very good swimmer. I can dog paddle like the dickens, however.
51. I briefly contemplated suicide as a child. I chickened out before anything happened.
52. I took my first drink of alcohol as a freshman in college.
53. I smoked pot for the first time that same year.
54. I was an overachiever in High School. Now, I'm just a lazy ass.
55. Morning sex is my favorite.
56. I'm horrible at finishing books all the way through.
57. I got my first (and, for now,) only tattoo, with my Mom. If you've met my mom, you realize that's not as weird as it sounds.
58. My favorite sexual positions are (wo)man on top, with doggie style taking a close second.
59. I won a spelling bee at age 6. I won against a fifth grader. I thought I was hot shit.
60. Mothers love me, and Fathers tend to make me nervous.
61. If I had a better body, I'd totally be a stripper. Until then, my lack of a better body keeps me out of trouble.
62. I sometimes have a complete and utter lack of common sense. I can be very analytical when giving advice, but totally emotional when it comes to my own problems.
63. When I was 12, I wanted to be a bartender-slash-lawyer, in The Navy.
64. I don't want to be in the Navy anymore, but the other two career choices still intrigue me.
65. People my age and younger tend to annoy me.
66. I have a scar on my left arm from donating plasma in college.
67. I also have scars from chicken pox, the monitors that were on me as a baby, my surgery from my busted ear drum, and from falling and gouging my chest into a chain link fence in second grade.
68. I have an innie, not an outie. (Belly button, that is)
69. Yes.
70. The first three things that attract me to someone, physically: Teeth, eyes, and legs.
71. The first three things that attract me to someone, mentally: intelligence, sarcasm, and open-mindedness.
72. I know a large amount of audience participation lines from The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
73. The first movie I remember seeing in the theaters was 101 Dalmatians.
74. The last one? Together.
75. I was in the circus in First Grade. I won a contest to ride on a unicorn-shaped float around the ring.
76. I also got my picture taken dressed as a clown.
77. Speaking of pictures, I've had nude pictures taken of me. It wasn't a pretty sight, I assure you.
78. I kickass at Trivia Pursuit. I know lots of random trivia.
79. At one time, I had subscriptions to both Playboy and The Advocate.
80. I love yoga. It relaxes me, makes me flexible, and surprisingly horny.
81. I'm pro-choice, but don't know if I could actually go through with it myself.
82. I want a child by the time I'm 30. If not that, at least a dog. Preferably a lab or golden retriever.
83. I like giving and receiving flowers to/from someone I'm dating.
84. Some of my favorite flowers are tulips, lilacs, and orchids.
85. I've had five cats (Jo-Jo, Woody, Whiskers, Sheba, and Doofus) and two dogs (Freckles and Rusty) in my lifetime.
86. I had a fish for a while, but I found them boring and hard to hug.
87. I've seen the ocean once. I wasn't impressed as I thought I'd be.
88. Ditto for Mardi Gras in New Orleans. Although I would probably enjoy it more now that I'm a bit more sexually liberated.
89. I don't get hangovers very often, but I've prayed to the porcelain god my fair share.
90. I bought my first porn recently. I should've just rented it; it's not that great.
91. I don't own sex toys, but have helped choose some for many friends. I would like a love swing, though.
92. I used to call my genitalia, "Johnny" when I was a child. I have no idea why.
93. I still refer to my Aunt Brenda as "Buzzy," so named by me when I couldn't pronounce "Brenda."
94. I'm a gay stereotype. I have a lisp.
95. I love making out, sometimes more than sex.
96. I'm a great kisser, although I didn't like kissing when I first started dating.
97. I'm proudest of my eyes and teeth.
98. I've never had braces.
99. I've worn glasses or contacts since the eighth grade.
100. I used to sing in choir or musicals in high school. Now, I hate singing in public, even at karaoke.

Now that I'm finally at 100, I feel like there's so many more things I could list. If you're reading this far, I'm amazed. If there's anything else you'd like to know about me, comment below, or email me. (This is an updated list. If you've seen this original list, I was chastized by Chris for cheating.)

*SIGH*

Sometimes I wish I weren't such an impatient Gemini. Also, today's the 1-year anniversary of my blog. Huzzah! Here's a peek of my first meaningless post, with more fun celebratory posts on the way later in the day.

STRAIGHT FROM THE HORSE'S MOUTH, WRAPPED IN RAFFIA. . .

Martha Stewart answers her critics:

In an open letter from her website:

"To My Friends and Loyal Supporters,

After more than a year, the government has decided to bring charges against me for matters that are personal and entirely unrelated to the business of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia. I want you to know that I am innocent - and that I will fight to clear my name.
I simply returned a call from my stockbroker. Based in large part on prior discussions with my broker about price, I authorized a sale of my remaining shares in a biotech company called ImClone. I later denied any wrongdoing in public statements and in voluntary interviews with prosecutors. The government's attempt to criminalize these actions makes no sense to me.

I am confident I will be exonerated of these baseless charges, but a trial unfortunately won't take place for months. I want to thank you for your extraordinary support during the past year - I appreciate it more than you will ever know.

For more information, please visit the special website I have established for you at www.marthatalks.com. I will do my best to post current information about the case, and you will be able to contact me there at martha@marthatalks.com. I look forward to hearing from you.




Sincerely,

(signed)

Martha Stewart"

The articles on the site are an interesting read, even with the probability of a biased point of view.

GRR. . .

So, even though my blog hasn't migrated to the new Blogger upgrade, I've been having problems with wbloggar all last night and today. So, for the moment, I've gotta log into the blogger site everytime I want to post, and it's really getting on my nerves.

Off to brew some java, and start scouring the want ads. Huzzah!

HEEHEEHEE. . .

This week's Strong Bad actually made me chortle out loud this morning. Definitely a delightful way to start the morning.

Speaking of delightful ways to wake up, I had another dream last night/this morning, and when I woke up at full attention, if you get what I'm sayin. *giggle*

Not bad for three hours of sleep, eh?

Ok, we'll try it this way. Enjoy.

HRM. . .

Ok, so I just recorded a lil' sumpin sumpin on my VoiceMonkey account, and it's 'posed to post directly to my blog. If it doesn't work, I'll figure something out later tonight.

:Currently listening to: Lords of Acid -- SpeedRacer Porn Mix

SO I'M A TEASE, BUT WE ALL KNEW THAT. . .

Ok, so I *tried* to call VoiceMonkey last night, but 1) I was in Ironton, MO, where I was in roaming mode. After quite a few beers, however, I tried later, anyway. Sadly, the line was busy.

But besides that, the wedding went off without a hitch. (Err. . .well, Sammie and Grady are now hitched, so, um. . . Anyway.) Sammie looked beautiful, as any bride should, I didn't spontaneously combust upon entering the Catholic Church for the first time in years, and I got to catch up with old friends, and meet new ones. And isn't how weddings are supposed to be?

AND I'M OFF. . .

Off to Sammie's wedding. . . This weekend's also going to be the test run of my new Voicemonkey service. So if you see a post that doesn't make any sense, click on it, and you'll hear what's going down, probably at the reception. (I don't drunk-dial, but I might drunk-blog.)

Thanks to Jhames, my blue-haired internet crush, for introducing me to the service.

Have a great weekend!

ONCE AGAIN, I'M MISTAKEN FOR ITALIAN. . .


You are Super Mario Bros. The most popular one of
all.


Which original Nintendo game are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Kudos to Todd for the linky fun.

SIGN THAT YOU KNOW YOU REALLY NEED TO GET A JOB:

After not falling asleep until 5:30 or so this morning, you dream that you wake up at noon. You wake up, slightly pissed off.


You are then relieved that it's only 9:30, so you haven't missed The Practice on F/X at 10 am.

*sigh* I wonder how many ways there are to say, "Would you like fries with that?" without sounding bitter. My guess is zero.

CHECKITOUT.

I'm sure most of you haven't noticed, because no one ever really sifts through the archives, but I've cleaned it up a bit on that right column. It was just getting to be too much clutter for my tastes. (Yes, I see the irony with two colums full of buttons and blogrolls, but I figured every little bit helps.)

SO, IT'S THREE AM, AND GUESS WHO ISN'T ASLEEP?

*Raises hand*

Yup. I've been mentally and a bit emotionally wiped out today, but I'm still awake. Karma will kick you in the ass everytime.

So why so wiped? Let's just say that the home life is going just swimmingly as usual (please note the drip drop of sarcasm there, won't you?), I've been up and down about the ongoing job search (mostly down), and I've just been a bit contemplative about my present state. (Missouri, har har.) It's something that's been on my mind since my birthday, and Steph and I talked about it this week. I'll spare you the mellodrama, but basically, this is not where I expected to be at this point in my life. (And by "this," I mean unemployed, living with my parents, driving a shitty car, and only one real romantic relationship to speak of)

*sigh* I'm just waiting for something from that kickass horoscope for June to come true. So far . . . not so much. This "same shit, different day" crap is getting old pretty fast.

AND THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR. . . (Or at least I have.)

The Naughty Nad Challenge is officially over. If you'd just like to get to see my goods, here you are. But I'd suggest looking at all the challengers at least once. Corky, you humble me. (Definitely *not* safe for work, in case you weren't aware.)

Enjoy! (And while you're at it. . . lemme know what you think. I need feedback, dear readers. Both good and bad. . . I can take it.)

(And if you'd like to take it, email me your contact info. Just kidding. I'm in one of those moods today.)

TELL ME SOMETHING I DIDN'T ALREADY KNOW. . .

"This spring's college graduates are entering the worst job market in 20 years," said Robert Reich, an economist and the secretary of labor in the Clinton administration.

Kudos to jd2b.com for the Linkage.

WELL SAID, MY BROTHER. . .

Thankfully, there are those that are feeling the way I am, but speak much more eloquently than I ever could.

Jen fowarded this article to me yesterday, and I had been meaning to comment on it.

But why listen to my inane ramblings, when there are those who say what I'm feeling much better than I ever could. I actually went on a lil' email rant of a similar vein to my friend Cory and this post, specifically the question of "3. What do you think is the one biggest issue holding the gay community back right now?".

Anyhoo. . .read what Jhames has to say. Lemme know if you think he and I are completely off base or not. OR, just answer the question above in the comments section. I look forward to an intriguing debate.

HEHEHE. . .

Greg just called me from Seattle, where he's visiting his mother. We're talking, and near the end of the conversation, when he says:

"Ok, so I'm about to head into a parking garage, so if the conversation cuts out. . . "

And then his call was dropped. Reminded me of the episode of Friends when Joey's on the Pay Phone and his time's about to run out. Too funny.

HEHE.

I'm reminded again why I love the news show Countdown.

1) The top story tonight is a poll by Roto-Rooter.

2) In the Countdown "Flashback," the announcement that it's the Dalai Lama's birthday was accompanied by the title song from "Hello Dolly!"

Giggle. I love TV.

HEHE. NOT A BIT SURPRISED, ARE YOU?

You Are "Fuck"!

What Swear Word Are You?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

SPEAKING OF FRIENDS. . .

Jennifer was reading my mind last night. Not once, but twice, she emailed me an interesting article she'd found, as I was reading that article. Freaky, eh?

I'VE FOUND A NEW ADDICTION. . .

Intrigued by this article and a post in Matt's blog, I joined Friendster last night. Not surprisingly, because of this social butterfly, I got this notification when I signed on this morning:

You are connected to 18024 people in your Personal Network, through 1 friend.

Toddly always seems to know everyone whenever we go out, and apparently, that trend follows him all over the place. And Friendster is proving my theory. Attractive people have attractive friends. Jaimee and I always joke about that, saying that at least if you're not dating your friends, they're purty to look at while they talk to you ;).

Anyhoo, if I didn't bug ya with a mass email last night, and you'd like to be my friend on my newest addiction, use this address when signing up.

REASONS NOT TO WATCH THE SIMPSONS WHILE DRINKING SODA. . .

Mr Burns to Homer: "You're so much more fun than Smithers, he doesn't know the meaning of the word "gay."

Disasterous results will ensue, including, but not limited to, soda out your nose.

GIDDY WITH EXPECTATION. . .

June is supposed to be a fantastic month for me, according to my favorite astrology site.

Here's hoping. . .

*crosses fingers*

CHECK BACK IN A YEAR OR SO. . .

I'm scared to think of how many of these things I do already. I can only imagine that my "pompous ass" levels will only increase once I hit law school.

ALSO, A NAUGHTY NADS UPDATE:

Pics have been taken, and sent to Chris. Look for updates on Uffish Thoughts in the near future, I'm sure.

Also, I'm nearly positive that I'll never actually use or wear my jewlery again. (It was entirely too uncomfortable for a "go commando" type of guy.) Any ideas of what alternate uses to make of it? Right now, the one that makes me giggle the most is a collar for my cat. (After it's been freshly sterilized, of course.)

YAY!

I'd thought that Bob Rybarczyk had taken some sort of hiatus, as my faithful bookmark just kept repeating to an article from a few weeks ago. But nope, he's still faithfully writing each week. Huzzah.

I've purchased a tape by the first instructor he's speaking of, Rodney Yee . He's pretty good, at least in my "Yoga for Abs" video. (Any guesses on how many times I've used that tape?)

Rob mentions that yoga is "so spiritual," but in my opinion, it's relaxing, albeit a bit too relaxing. It makes me a *tad* bit horny afterwards. I'm not sure if it's the relaxation, or being in touch with my body, but I remember after classes at SMSU, I'd just want to shag anything that walked. Anyone else have that experience?

Anyhoo. . . . just another shameless plug for Suburban Fringe. To find the archive on STLToday.com, just type Rob's name in the search. Voila!

HUZZAH!

IA has returned! And I wouldn't have known if Jen hadn't kept her old link up. Once again, procrastination pays off.

And now, I'm off to shower, shave, and take some pictures with my craptastic webcam. Sadly, Greg probably wouldn't have let me borrow his new digital camera for this endeavor, even if I had asked nicely.

IT'S TIME FOR THIS WEEK'S MONDAY MISSION!

PromoGuy's Monday Mission 3.22

1. One thing that really annoys me is when someone at work will just start clipping their fingernails at their desk. In most cases, it is men who do this, which only makes it worse. I can't explain why this grates on my nerves, but when I hear that "click-click-click" of the clippers, I just imagine nasty fingernail fragments flying everywhere. What habit do people have that drives you crazy but doesn't seem to bother anyone else?

Hehe. Grinding your fork against your teeth? (Sadly, only Jaimee gets the joke.) I think the things that drive me crazy seem to drive everyone else crazy. Boring people.

2. I just had to replace the compressor in my car. That was $400 I didn't have that is now gone. Have you had any expensive car trouble recently?

Um. . . I'd have expensive car trouble if I had the money to get my car fixed. Or if I actually bought a new car. Hehe. Maybe I should add that to my list over on the left. After "get a job," before "go to law school."

3. A friend of mine came over for dinner with us this recently, and brought her baby. At only 8 months he is as cute as the dickens, but when he got hungry, his momma just whipped out her boob for him to start chowin' down on. Among friends or family I can see why she wouldn't be shy, but it still made me a little uncomfortable. I realize it is a natural function and wonderful bonding experience, but I wasn't ready to be a part of it. How do you feel about mothers who breastfeed their children in public? At what age do you think they should stop?

Um. . . at the risk of getting slapped next time I see Ms. La Leche League, I'll just say that it doesn't make me uncomfortable (props, to you, Lis. . .), but I think once the kids have enough teeth to bite, or enough vocabulary to request to be nursed, it's time to end it.

4. I was watching the "Antiques Road Show" recently, and the resident "expert" presented the "Atari 2600" game system as a popular collectible. I am now officially OLD! Do you recall the first item from your youth that became an "antique" and made you feel old and how you felt? Or if it hasn't happened, yet, what item do you think it will be and how do you expect it to make you feel?

Well, the Atari-as-a-collectible makes me feel old, but I think the one that will really freak me out is when a VCR is considered a collectible. We were pretty earlier adopters of VHS (I remember having an old Panasonic top-loader until I was in college). Amazingly, it took the family *years* to make the adjustment to DVDs.

5. It started raining last night as I was going to bed. Not storming or a hard rain, just a nice rainfall. The pitter-patter of raindrops hitting the window made for a peaceful way to drift to sleep (and also made it hard to wake up this morning). Do you like rainy days/nights? What type of weather makes you feel relaxed?

"Oh I love the rainy nights. . ." to quote a country band I can't recall. Rainy nights make me amorous, which in turn makes me relaxed.

6. We used to joke about the retired couple across the street. Every night, they would pull out their lawn chairs, sit in their driveway and watch the world go by. We laughed about how someone would just waste away their life like that. Now 8 years later, I pull out the lawn chairs and we find ourselves doing exactly the same thing. Life has a way of making one humble. Have you ever found that you have become that which you once ridiculed?

Every day of my life. What are friends for if not to ridicule you? ;)

7. Have you ever sent an e-mail to the wrong person? What was the most embarrassing experience you remember?

No, but I frequently am too much of a dumbass to attach things to emails. And of course that "All hail to the watchtowers of the north" email wasn't embarrassing, but pretty damned funny. Remind me to tell you that story sometime.

BONUS: You know, you got me spellbound what else can it be?

It can be nothing else but my wit and charm.

Today's Comment Question: Write a caption for this photo!

Hrm. I'm debating between "This wasn't in my ball boy job description!" and "Male homosexual courtship rituals have finally reached the tennis court"

AND THE WORLD SIGHS AS ANOTHER BLOGGER BIDS US ADIEU.

First it was Attorneys Suck. Now, Encorswish. No more Shoot the Duck. No more random sports picture captions. 'Tis sad. A fond farewell, and here's hoping you'll be back soon.

Addendum: Just perusing my blogroll before bed, and apparently, Matt @ Ordinary Life is calling it quits, too. *Sigh.*